Henny Youngman Quotes

One time I went to a hotel. I asked the bellhop to handle my bag. He felt up my wife!

The most important thing you can do is make the distinction between customer service and guest hospitality. You need both things to thrive, but they are completely different.

Some of the greatest businesses operating from a deeper purpose have a real commitment to service, like Four Seasons, Joie de Vivre hotels, Southwest Airlines, and JetBlue.

I've done the day jobs and slung towels at the Beverly Hills Hotel.

People who treat waitresses or waiters rudely - or taxi drivers - I have very little tolerance for those people. They work really hard. They deserve courtesy and respect.

Waiters and waitresses are becoming nicer and much more caring. I used to pay my check, they would say "Thank you." That's now escalated into "You care care of yourself, now." The other day I paid my check and the waiter said, "Don't put off that mammogram."

The service in L.A. is the best. You don't get sarcastic, surly, fed-up waiters and waitresses like you do in England. They're good at their job and they're there for the customer. The only depressing thing is a lot of them have written more screenplays than me.

Why don't they have waiters in waiting rooms?

I have tipped waiters, and I have been tipped by waiters.

I've worked in a call centre and as a nightclub waitress. I served champagne to Rihanna.

When I was in the restaurant and bar business, I followed a rule, which was that the places that I opened were places that I wanted to go to.

Having been in the restaurant business, our job in the restaurant business is to be responsible for our customers' happiness. It's the nature of the hospitality business. You need to take care of people. You take care of customers above all others. Customers are your lifeblood.

Ultimately, we're in the service business. We will always have an important human element.

I never thought about acting, I wanted to be an air hostess.

Personally, I'm a fan of valets and managers.

If I ran a national burger franchise - which I don't - I'd make it a rule that no two customers can be greeted with precisely the same words and that every third customer must be grossly insulted as a matter of course. Just to keep the atmosphere nice and lively. And to keep the staff laughing.

I was a host and a busboy and a barback.

I was a bartender, a hot-dog vendor, a cook, sold magazine subscriptions.

Isn't this a wonderful country? I was in Florida. I'm staying at a motel called the Three Palms. It's run by a middle-aged couple, one of whom is missing a hand. OK! That's what I thought, too! But they got upset when I asked.

Remember,' she'd tell her staff, 'every customer wants to feel like a princess, and princesses are selfish and overbearing.

The service at this airport restaurant is so bad I'm starting to panic that I'm a ghost.

IF YOUR JOB IS CUSTOMER SATISFACTION, YOUR REAL JOB TITLE IS PROBLEM SOLVER.

New York waiters, probably the surliest in the Western world . . . are better images of their city than that journalistic favorite the taxi driver.

Do they allow tipping on the boat? - Yes, sir. Have you got two fives? - Oh, yes, sir. Then you won't need the ten cents I was going to give you.

There's not a sense that the person who is waiting on the table is somehow a lesser person that the person who is eating in the restaurant.