George Carlin Quotes

It pays to get drunk with the best people.

It's not a crime to get drunk.

At the third cup, wine drinks the man.

All excess is ill, but drunkenness is of the worst sort. It spoils health, dismounts the mind, and unmans men. It reveals secrets, is quarrelsome, lascivious, impudent, dangerous and mad. In fine, he that is drunk is not a man: because he is so long void of Reason, that distinguishes a Man from a Beast.

I drank too much, only champagne.

He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days.

I admit I was drinking a Guinness... but I did not swallow.

You don't quite know how drunk you are until all of a sudden you're on the floor.

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.

I doubt if you can have a truly wild party without liquor.

Man, being reasonable, must get drunk; the best of life is but intoxication.

Come, for my part I will have only those glorious, manly pleasures of being very drunk, and very slovenly.

Wine is a mocker, strong drink is riotous; and whoever is deceived by it is not wise

The Prophet hath cursed ten persons on account of wine: one, the first extractor of the juice of the grape for others; the second, for himself; the third, the drinker of it; the fourth, the bearer of it; the fifth, the person to whom it is brought; the sixth, the waiter; the seventh, the seller of it; the eighth, the eater of its price; the ninth, the buyer of it; the tenth, that person who hath purchased it for another.

Liquor drinking is not a wrong; but excessive drinking is.

He who drinks too much beer must drink water

Drunkenness was attacked in the same manner; it was discountenanced on every occasion by those who had charge of any department: its destructive and pernicious effects were frequently stated by his own more prudent comrades, at the proper moment when the individual was soberly suffering from the effects of his previous excess; pot- and public-houses were gradually removed from the immediate vicinity of their dwellings; the health and comfort of temperance were made familiar to them; by degrees drunkenness disappeared, and many who were habitual bacchanalians are now conspicuous for undeviating sobriety.

Most of the males have a strong passion for strong drink, especially rum.

Wine is wont to show the mind of man.

I did so many crazy things while drinking.

I have never been drunk in my life, and I don't expect I ever will be.

I drink a lot of beer.

I simply don't know how to act as if I am drunk.

A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death.