Chelsea Handler Quotes

I can't comment on what every single presidential candidate is saying or doing.

I'm not going to respond to every single thing that Donald Trump has to say or that Hillary Clinton says.

It's starting to look like Donald Trump may be a serious presidential candidate. If you're in my line of work, Trump running for president for real is the greatest thing that has ever happened.

Whoever's president I'm not going to be short on material.

Donald Trump is at his very best, at his very best, when he talks about the issues.

I've been making fun of Donald Trump - we all have - for 10 years, and just bringing up his name... I mean, even if you're supportive of Donald Trump, there's still a lot to make fun of.

Donald Trump can ultimately make the case for himself.

There are so many political talk shows out there that are doing such a good job that it would be foolish of me to try to get in the ring with them.

My 2016 was basically spent covering Donald Trump and falling madly in love with James Fletcher.

There's so much being said about Donald Trump already, all the time, and the more you joke about him, the more you risk making the same jokes other people are making about him.

[If Donald Trump does get elected, I will be] probably Secretary Of Reeducation. Or I don't know. I'll probably end up working in the cafeteria.

I guarantee you [Hillary Clinton] is smoking in humiliation over the idea that she needs to heal and that [Donald] Trump's the guy to do it. That was great.

This book, 'Free bird', is so entangled with politics. I wanted to channel my own internal political monologue in some way to get it out of my brain. I'm not happy that the themes of the book have become more relevant as the publication date nears. Most of it was written in 2014 or so, before the whole Donald Trump thing began. As people paying attention know, the rise of Trump and Trumpism is not an aberration or sudden kind of phenomena.

George Bush says, 'Gore's book needs a lot of explaining.' Of course, Bush says that about every book.

In fact, is beginning to use a lot of the language and phraseology that we have used. In fact, I think I saw Hillary Clinton TV ad, and I thought it was me.

That Mitt Romney, he is a master campaigner. This week he was introducing his wife, and he said, 'She is the heavyweight champion of my life.” Which may explain why on the ride home, he was strapped to the roof of the car.

It's fascinating watching the debates [of Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump], with the search for the new president. It's like a car crash, unfolding in front of your eyes. The level of personal attacks!

Hillary Clinton will be a disaster for our country, a disaster in so many other ways.

Donald Trump is interesting to people. He's intriguing. But they want to see that Donald Trump in the White House. And he's getting there and he's going to pivot there.

I think politicians and comedians have a lot in common. One is a group of approval-seeking narcissists who will say and do anything to be liked... and comedians are always talking about politics.

Donald Trump's talking down our democracy. And I, for one, am appalled that somebody who is the nominee of one of our two major parties would take that kind of position.

I think what we journalists too often do is we assume the status quo is unchangeable. I think all sorts of issues of political reform, electoral reform need more discussion than they get.

Obviously, we went after Trump quite a bit, but I also feel like, we can't be on anyone's side, really. We need to be on comedy's side, so we need to be fairly going after everyone, because the entire political system is a circus. So it's been fun and interesting, and I hope people enjoy the evolution of the show. It'll continue to evolve because you can't do the same show forever. I feel like people would get bored with that.

Ann Romney talking about middle class moms is like Chris Christie talking about a salad

Donald Trump announced today he is running for president of the United States. Traditionally that means six more weeks of comedy.