Phyllis Diller Quotes

An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

But if I wasn't playing, I would drink Saturdays, then Sunday, then Monday. Then I would try and train and it was no good, then have another drink just to pass the day away.

When I was 20, I was drinking. When I was 30, I was drinking more, and at 40, way too much.

One drink is too many for me and a thousand not enough.

In my family, they were all big boozers.

You know a little drink now and then never hurt nobody, but when you can't git started without asking the bottle, you in trouble.

Drunks do not have friends, but accomplices.

Z is for Zillah who drank too much gin.

I knew at quite a young age that I had an issue with drinking.

I look like the kind of guy who has a bottle of beer in my hand.

He is a drunkard who takes more than three glasses though he be not drunk.

The greatest pleasure of this people [Russians] is drunkenness.

Liquor drinking is not a wrong; but excessive drinking is.

We knew the old liar drank a lot, but now we know just how much: 'He begins the morning with a sherry, then has a bottle of Burgundy with lunch. He often has a glass of port after lunch, but always one after dinner. There is whiskey in the afternoon and Champagne with dinner. Then some more port, and a glass of Cognac. As the night goes on, a whiskey and soda...'

… there are two things that will be believed of any man whatsoever, and one of them is that he has taken to drink.

I'm on a whisky diet... last week, I lost three days!

My relationship with alcohol became unsustainable. For people who are going to ask, 'Were you an alcoholic?' I suppose the short answer is 'Yes.'

My relationship in the past with alcohol has been both good fun and unhealthy.

The English are very indulgent to episodes of alcoholic insanity.

It's that idea that you can have one drink - and no you can't. Within a week I was drinking heavily. It was so quick that even I was like, 'Wow.'

My old man's got a problem, he lives with the bottle.

I think that I'm coming off as the biggest alcoholic in the world.

I drink too much, way too much; my doctor drew blood he ran a tab!

A person can attack that bottle of vodka and drink it like it's a bottle of cold water. Two of my wife's girlfriends died from drinking. They weren't big pill-takers; they were drinkers. So it can't be so simple as to slide away, like Marilyn Monroe.

I know I can get to the stage where I'm drinking a lot. I tend to be rotten and groggy all day and hanging out for the next drink and five o'clock, ping! I have to just stop.