Cooking Failure Quotes

I can't cook.

I'm a very good dishwasher. I'm a terrible cook. I'm an awful cook.

I turned down 'Come Dine With Me' because I can't cook.

I love my food and wine; I have tried my hand at being a chef and failed miserably.

I don't know how to cook at all.

Truly thou art damned, like an ill-roasted egg, all on one side.

I've never cooked a great meal.

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.

If I'm really honest, I can't cook. I'm, like, the worst, worst, worst cook in the world.

My mother was the worst cook ever. In school, when we traded lunches, I had to throw in an article of clothing.

I don't cook very well at all. I'm the girl that can't make scrambled eggs.

Yes, the first time I made flapjacks it was like granola, I forgot to put the sugar in, so I went through hours of mixing it and making it then I went to cut into it, and it fell apart.

I recall my mum tried to teach me how to fry chicken once, and I almost burned down half the kitchen... I don't think I have the patience for cooking.

I'm a terrible cook.

In high school, I tried to cook dinner for a girl, and it was horrific. It was at her house. I was trying to make pork chops with my mom's recipe, just trying to be Mr. Awesome, like, 'Yeah, I cook, too.' But I just burned everything. There was smoke everywhere.

I am a very bad cook. I can never make proper Indian food.

Bacon is so good by itself that to put it in any other food is an admission of failure. You're basically saying, 'I can't make this other food taste good, so I'll throw in bacon.'

I am a very bad cook.

At the root of many a woman's failure to become a great cook lies her failure to develop a workmanlike regard for knives.

I like cooking but I don't know much and whenever I enter the kitchen, my mother sends me out! Because whenever I try a dish from a book, it comes out bad.

I can't cook. I can barely make a bowl of cereal.

I just Google whatever the hell I want to cook, and I try to cook it by what they tell me to do. If it's not good, I don't eat it.

I know it sounds funny, but every time I have a disaster in the kitchen, it knocks my confidence level a little bit more, and I feel annoyed with myself that I can't do better.

The problem is that there is many great chefs and many great cookbooks, but none of them work at home.

Burning dinner is not incompetence but war.