Billy Connolly Quotes

I used to watch a programme about Route 66 in America, and it looked so fun.

Last year we drove across the country...We had one cassette tape to listen to on the entire trip... I don't remember what it was.

It's funny, as a little kid, you look up to those guys who you play as in 'Madden,' and now to see myself in the game, it's an honor.

I guess when you turn off the main road, you have to be prepared to see some funny houses.

The one thing I miss is hitchhiking. Now there's no more of that. When's the last time you saw a hitchhiker? It's not that I consider it a great sport, but it was my way of seeing the country. The open road, especially in the western United States, is still very pristine, but everything else around it has changed.

When I was a kid, I used to watch 'Laurel and Hardy' with my cousins all the time. I still think they're extremely funny and so surreal.

We've got a bunch of new writers now who tell me they grew up watching The Simpsons. It's bizarre, and they're writing some very funny stuff.

Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is best not to stir them.

From the earliest memories I have, I liked physical, funny things.

If I'm backed into a corner, the first thing that comes to mind is the robot from Forbidden Planet. But that could be me trying to be kitschy, cool, and cultural, because the real answer is R2D2.

When I grow up, I want to have an exhibit called 'American Motel.'

I always wanted to be known as the Norman Rockwell of television, and 'Happy Days' represented the part of me that wanted to make mainstream America laugh.

I was a comedy fan when I was a little kid.

Most of my read on America is through looking through the front windshield of a bus and hanging out with country music fans backstage.

The '80s was a great decade for comedy.

I'm really into ghost towns. I've driven cross-country the past few summers, and I would stop at some ghost towns along the way. They're like a microcosm of America as a whole.

I was the class clown when I was a little young mustache.

When I was a little boy, I was fascinated by the way my dad used to laugh at the telly, and from a very early age, I had an idea of what was funny and why people laughed.

I love to smile. I love to laugh. I like to hear jokes. For instance, when I'm on the road, every night I watch 'Seinfeld.' I find it somewhere. I think it's so funny, and I watch the repeats over and over again.

I tell ya when I was a kid, all I knew was rejection. My yo-yo, it never came back.

I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.

I was watching the Superbowl with my 92 year old grandfather. The team scored a touchdown. They showed the instant replay. He thought they scored another one. I was gonna tell him, but I figured the game HE was watching was better.

I remember when I got my first Adam Sandler CD and it was the funniest thing I'd ever heard in my entire life, and continues to be.

I tried to throw a yo-yo away. It was impossible.

I love Valentine's Day. When you're a kid everyone gets a Valentine. It's like 'TO TIM, NICE PANTS, LOVE SCOTT'. It's Valentines galore!