Jim Gaffigan Quotes

The night before Tilbury, the Cordon Bleu gourmet dinner turned out Cordon Brown. Six out of ten to the chef for trying and ten out of ten to us for eating it.

We'll send you a Hogwarts toilet seat!

Humor is probably the most significant characteristics of the human mind. Far more significant than reason. In fact, reason is actually a very cheap commodity.

Sometimes a witticism has no truth behind it.

I've always thought something that makes you laugh, it makes you laugh because there's a little bit of truth to it.

Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.

Everything is ironic to me. There are moments I find hysterical, but I'm probably the only one who would find that, except for a few people.

No subject is unsuitable for comedy.

A laugh is a terrible weapon.

Humor has justly been regarded as the finest perfection of poetic genius.

You know, funny is this weird word for me. I hear is so many times it has no meaning anymore.

I don't control the line of 'funny,' 'funny,' 'funny,' 'not funny.'

Humor is everywhere in that there's irony in just about anything a human does.

All genuinely intellectual work is humorous.

A lot of people don't think of my work as being all that funny, but I think it's hilarious!

Humor brings insight and tolerance. Irony brings a deeper and less friendly understanding.

You can take anything, and if you explore it right, you can make it funny.

Comedy is a great weapon of attack. It's not a great weapon of support.

We do not take humor seriously enough.

I didn't think that anything is beyond humor - not profane humor, but a good, honest approach to humor.

I've always been very upfront about the way I write, and I've always used the tools humorists use, such as exaggeration.

I have a fine sense of the ridiculous, but no sense of humor.

I no longer believe that just about everything is funny, if viewed from the proper angle.

When things get so absurd and so stupid and so ridiculous that you just can't bear it, you cannot help but turn everything into a joke.

Wit is the lowest form of humor.