Dennis Miller Quotes

Normally when one reporter talks to you at a tournament it's no big deal.

I devised the Bert Lance Toe Test then - you go out on the front porch of the house, turn 'The Washington Post' over with your big toe, and if your name's above the fold, you know you're not going to have a good day.

I was on stage last night, and I gave a medical report about Donald Trump. I said he was hospitalized for an attack of modesty.

If there were rankings for press conferences, I wouldn't have to worry about dropping out of the top five, I hope.

I truly have a love-hate thing with the press.

He did once say the time to worry is when they stop writing about you but again I think that was pretty token of the coverage was very respectful, he rather resented the intrusions on his private life, but that was about it.

I've never liked the press part of it (no offense), but it comes with the job.

Every year, the White House Correspondents' Dinner inspires two competing varieties of coverage: celebrity-obsessed fawning and angry tirades about how it represents everything twisted about our broken democracy. It doesn't, really.

Washington is the only city in the world where you can go to a black-tie dinner and there at the foot of the table is a television set up to catch a press conference.

I'm a great admirer of 'The Simpsons.' It's very surprising because it's backed by a right-wing television company in the U.S., and quite often it's poking fun at the people who would be its audience.

My whole career has been an Ann Coulter roast.

Politicians don't say no to cameras very often.

I'm on all the channels. I'm on every channel. Not just Fox. I'm even on the channels that attack me all the time.

An ocean of ink - real and virtual - has been spilled critiquing the appearance of female politicians.

When it comes to politics, comedians read between the lines and see hypocrisies and half-truths. And we report those things to regular people who go, 'I noticed that, too!' or 'You're right, that doesn't make sense!'

A race without journalists also has one advantage for Max: he does not have to give so many interviews.

When I tell people that I get interviewed five or six times more than I will interview players or coaches leading up to the game that comes as a surprise. That's part of it and it just goes with being part of a Super Bowl broadcast team. I enjoy it.

Trump loves the media. Trump understands the power it has and, accordingly, loves the people who have media power.

I've been making fun of administrations since I was a teenager onstage.

I don't think Donald Trump is afraid of journalists. If he was, he wouldn't be on the TV every hour on the hour.

Wit puts politicians at risk.

I'm enjoying turning down all requests for interviews. I don't miss being in politics.

I'm obsessed with how the press handles Donald Trump and how Trump handles the press.

Time magazine put Chris Christie on the cover with the caption, 'The Elephant in the Room.' And People magazine named him 'Sexiest Garbage Truck in a Suit.'

A lot of people from the press want to talk to me, but they never do.