Mitch Hedberg Quotes

If I can't see the humor in it, how am I going to be funny?

Comedy is surprises, so if you're intending to make somebody laugh and they don't laugh, that's funny.

How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand.

If it bends, it's funny; if it breaks, it's not funny.

It's funny because it's funny.

The whole point of comedy, what's fun, is taking the stupid thought I had and working it into something that makes a bunch of people laugh.

Sometimes WRONG is worth the FUNNY!

I said to the waitress, "There's a fly swimming in my soup." She said: "You've got too much soup - he should only be able to paddle."

I bought a dictionary. First thing I did was, I looked up the word "dictionary", and it said "you're an asshole".

For me, if you distill comedy down, it is surprise and the unexpected. That has to be it on its most base level, in any form.

I've always thought something that makes you laugh, it makes you laugh because there's a little bit of truth to it.

Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.

Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.

I like to think my sense of humor is sort of smart and dumb at the same time. I like to work on multiple levels - smart and dumb, funny and sad, profound and mundane, cynical and hopeful.

Everything is ironic to me. There are moments I find hysterical, but I'm probably the only one who would find that, except for a few people.

I had an idea of what I thought was funny. It's kind of based on how I am.

Comedy comes from confusion.

No subject is unsuitable for comedy.

You shouldn't get too close to the truth, because then maybe you stop being funny.

Humor is very interesting to me. My films are not comedies, but there's comedy in them from time to time, absurdities, just like in real life.

The best shows to tweet about are the ones that are hilarious, but they might not necessarily be trying to be hilarious. Those are the easiest and the funniest because you're like 'come onnnn.'

I wanna make a jigsaw puzzle that's 40,000 pieces. And when you finish it, it says 'go outside.'

Humor is everywhere in that there's irony in just about anything a human does.

A lot of people don't think of my work as being all that funny, but I think it's hilarious!

Humor is really one of the hardest things to define, very hard. And it's very ambiguous. You have it, or you don't. You can't attain it.