Penn Jillette Quotes

I don't smoke and I don't drink alcohol.

I feel like if you wanna be sober and you can't handle being around someone who drinks, then don't do it.

I am too much of a control freak to be a drinker.

I promise ... to abstain from all kinds of intoxicating drink, unless used medically.

The only thing that makes me uncomfortable is when people that do drink, don't drink around me.

It's better to take sobriety with you when you work.

An American monkey, after getting drunk on brandy, would never touch it again, and thus is much wiser than most men.

I work very hard to keep on an even keel as far as alcohol is concerned.

Sometimes it would be nice to just have some red wine with dinner, but it's not worth the risk. I have a great life, a great situation. Why would I want to risk self-destructive behaviour?

I had to give up martinis - I enjoyed them too much.

Today, if you're not an alcoholic, you're nobody.

I've never taken drugs. My drug, I suppose, is drink. I never drink before I sing, but I do make up for it when I come off!

I cannot drink or do anything that changes the mind.

Drinking spirits cannot cause spiritual damage.

In my private life, I'm not around any drugs or alcohol.

I don't really like to drink. I don't like the way alcohol feels or tastes. On occasion I'll do it as a social thing, just to kind of go, 'Hey! I did something with you guys!'

We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given to us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it.

Yes I drink, but at least I don't drink blood!

Drunkenness was attacked in the same manner; it was discountenanced on every occasion by those who had charge of any department: its destructive and pernicious effects were frequently stated by his own more prudent comrades, at the proper moment when the individual was soberly suffering from the effects of his previous excess; pot- and public-houses were gradually removed from the immediate vicinity of their dwellings; the health and comfort of temperance were made familiar to them; by degrees drunkenness disappeared, and many who were habitual bacchanalians are now conspicuous for undeviating sobriety.

Lips that touch liquor shall never touch mine.

My definition of sobriety is to be in full control and not feel drunk, but it's not abstaining for religious reasons or any other reason.

When people ask me, 'Why don't you drink?' I usually smile and say 'Because I'm not good at it.'

I'll never feel comfortable taking a strong drink, and I'll never feel easy smoking a cigarette. I just don't think those things are right for me.

And I have always told the patients when I talk to them. When they come around and say, 'What will you have to drink? Oh that's right you don't drink.' Just speak up and say, 'Of course I drink. But I just don't drink alcohol.'

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.