Mark Hoppus Quotes

I don't like doing stand-up, because I don't like standing up.

Pete and Repeat are in a boat, Pete jumps out who's left in the boat?

The girl hurried away, but then Pippi shouted, "Did he have big ears that reached way down to his shoulders?" "No," said the girl and turned and came running back in amazement. "You don't mean to say that you have seen a man walk by with such big ears?" "I have never seen anyone who walks with his ears," said Pippi. "All the people I know walk with their feet.

We came from the sea originally, now we're going back in it. Don't go in it, unless you're in a boat.

Look at the limes in this drink, how they float. That's good news. Next time I'm on a boat, and it capsizes, I will reach for a lime. I'm saved by the buoyancy of citrus.

Nobody drowns by falling in the water...but by staying there.

I saw a tree fall in the woods, and I didn't hear it.

A pun is the lowest form of humor—when you don't think of it first.

So what are those balloons for? In case you fall off your hoverboard?' -- Tally to Peris

A dugout is much superior to a conventional manufactured canoe because you can get soaking wet without bothering to capsize it.

LAST, n. A shoemaker's implement, named by a frowning Providence as opportunity to the maker of puns.

I had imagined I would come back at some point. But yeah, that was for a very specific reason. I will be very excited when I can tweet things that are just stupid puns and not be political for a while.

And if you voz to see my roziz As is a boon to all men's noziz, - You'd fall upon your back and scream - '" Lawk! O criky! it's a dream!"

Humor wades across a brook, wit jumps over it.

Some logics get nervous breakdowns. Overloaded phone system behaves like frightened child. Mike did not have upsets, acquired sense of humor instead. Low one. If he were a man, you wouldn't dare stoop over. His idea of thigh-slapper would be to dump you out of bed — or put itch powder in pressure suit.

I fell, you see. Trod on my abbot, Father Habit. Oh, dear! I mean.

A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine, we pulled his boat into the dock, I lifted up this big 'ol stringer of bass and this idiot on the dock goes, Hey, y'all catch all them fish? Nope - Talked 'em into giving up. Here's your sign.

I do not think therefore I am a moustache

If you make people laugh or cry about little black marks on sheets of white paper, what is that but a practical joke? All the great story lines are great practical jokes that people fall for over and over again.

Women wearing men's clothes are chic, men wearing women's clothes make us fall on the floor laughing.

Friendship is an island that you retreat to and you all fall on the floor and laugh at all the other ninnies that don't have enough brains to have your good taste.

Are we so desperate for entertainment that we will fall for a Trickless magician?? Saw a woman in half. Pull a rabbit out of a hat. Do something! What tricks does this guy have? "I'm in a box...and I ain't gonna eat.". "I'm in a box... and I ain't gonna eat!!" That ain't no trick! That's called living in the projects!

Then there was the time in Hollywood when I sat down in a breakaway chair and it collapsed on me. I was nearly knocked out and might have been even more seriously hurt but my fall was broken by the smog.

He'd (Yogi Berra) fall in a sewer and come up with a gold watch.