Craig Ferguson Quotes

I give the president credit for at least one thing. He's proven that someone can deserve a Nobel prize less than Al Gore.

Cunning is neither the consequence of sense, nor does it give sense. A proof that it is not sense, is that cunning people never imagine that others can see through them. It is the consequence of weakness.

The word "tip" stands for "to insure promptness." So when should you give it? Up front,of course. Sophisticated people don't take chances on poor service, they insure good service.

Are you balanced? Do you share your time, your energy, your life, as much with yourself as you do with those around you?. . . . Know your limits. You are one of the most important people you need to look after and love. Balance your time, your energy, your life with those around you. You'll be able to give more freely and joyfully as a result, and you'll be more open to the gifts of the universe. It's not wrong to give to others. But it's okay to say yes to ourselves, too.

It was frustrating when people loved you and took an interest in you and sometimes worried about you and personally cared what you did with yourself. Lena wished that love were something you could flip on and off. You could turn it on when you felt good bout yourself and worthy of it and generous enough to return it. You could clip it off when you needed to hide or self-destruct and had nothing at all to give." (Lena, 194)

Working people really amaze me. When you give them all the facts, they make the right decision every single time.

And I thought well, if Tina Turner can go up there and she can give everything for 500 people, no matter how sick I am, I can make it happen too.

We were all born, and we all came to the music business with everything we had. Some of us just don't get a chance. Now there's a lot of other people like myself, indeed, who are getting heard worldwide. That gives other artists a chance.

A budget is not an issue. I mean a budget is used if you need more weeks or more time or more elements, but the creative process is exactly the same. In some instances you become more of a boss when you are doing a small movie. So that is not so relevant. The only thing is that the bigger a movie is in terms of budget, is that there are more people giving opinions.

I'm too amused by the way people carry on to give in to despair.

You have to encourage people not to give in to the temptation to be normal, even if it isn't easy - because when you're young, you really want to belong.

The first duty of a government is to give education to the people.

But how much better, in any case, to wonder than not to wonder, to dance with astonishment and go spinning in praise, than not to know enough to dance or praise at all; to be blessed with more imagination than you might know at the given moment what to do with than to be cursed with too little to give you -- and other people -- any trouble.

People above you, they never want to share power with you. Why you look to them? They give you nothing. People below you, you give them hope, you give them respect, they give you power, cause they don't think they have any, so they don't mind giving it up.

Giving people like Dodd and Frank more authority is like rewarding an arsonist with gasoline and matches.

Ride your emotions as the shallop rides the waves; don't get upset among them. There are people who enjoy getting swamped emotionally, just as, incredibly, there are people who enjoy getting drunk.

What organized dating sites fail to understand is that the people are far more interesting in what they don't say about themselves.

Socrates himself said, 'One thing only I know, and this is that I know nothing.' Remember this statement, because it is an admission that is rare, even among philosophers. Moreover, it can be so dangerous to say in public that it can cost you your life. The most subversive people are those who ask questions. Giving answers is not nearly as threatening. Any one question can be more explosive than a thousand answers.

I love that I'm able to take people away just for a little while. Even if they come to my show and it's an escape from taxes or heartbreak or a shitty workplace experience - all those human beings I get to sing for laugh and emote with give me more happiness than I could ever give them.

Great people and champions are special gifts of God, whom He gives and preserves; they do their work, and achieve great actions, not with vain imaginations, or cold and sleepy cogitations, but by motion of God.

Do you know the Democrats can't raise a dime? The Democrats' fundraising is practically nonexistent. And on the other side of that, Republican fundraising is through the roof! It's through the roof to the point that people can't believe it, even on the Republican side. Now, they're not gonna give Trump credit for it. I don't know who else is getting credit, but it should be Trump. But Republican fundraising is going through the roof. And I guarantee you the people giving the Republicans money are doing it because of Trump.

The farmers markets were another step to giving people an opportunity to take more power over their own lives-and also to provide another outlet for organic produce. That is important because the production and distribution of food is increasingly being monopolized and controlled by large corporate structures, large financial structures.

If I can upset people, if I can ruin their day, then I have done my job.

For me, my discomfort with gay weddings was articulated by a close friend, who observed that gay people getting married is like retarded people getting together to give each other PhDs. It doesn't make them smarter, and it doesn't make us married.

People wish their enemies dead - but I do not; I say give them the gout, give them the stone!