Jimmy Fallon Quotes

I know every politician spins the truth a little.

How is the world ruled and led to war? Diplomats lie to journalists and believe these lies when they see them in print.

In politics, a lie unanswered becomes truth within 24 hours.

You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks.

The Big Lie: Hitler Invented It. Stalin Perfected It. Nixon Uses It.

If you think the Obama White House and Ben Rhodes lying to the American people about Iran - and laughing about it - was bad, just wait until Hillary Clinton's spin doctors get hold of the media.

Even the worst dictator, there is not a single one of them who would say "Oh yes, I violate human rights." They all claim "oh no, we respect human rights" even when they are doing the most egregious things.

Fascism is a lie told by bullies.

I kind of wish people didn’t know who I am, that I could just lie, say I’m a speechwriter for Obama. This is what I said before Twilight. And then Obama came along and picked up all these young writers. I found out this guy, Jon Favreau — who’s not the actor Jon Favreau — is writing for him. And I was like, Wow, I wonder if the people who thought I was bullshitting at the time are like, ‘Oh my god. That guy! That kid who was drunk in some bar actually wrote the health care bill!’

Because the regime is captive to its own lies, it must falsify everything. It falsifies the past. It falsifies the present, and it falsifies the future. It falsifies statistics. It pretends not to possess an omnipotent and unprincipled police apparatus. It pretends to respect human rights. It pretends to prosecute no one. It pretends to fear nothing. It pretends to pretend nothing.

Liberals tell amazing lies about guns and everything else.

Over time, the repetition, Donald Trump's lies about election rigging, have become a form of background noise, more of the same. And this is a propaganda technique, whether Trump knows it or not.

Barack Obama's class has always been an illusion clouded in faculty lounge, lizard lounge talk, and Michelle Obama's class has actually been told us by the media that it exists, but there isn't any. There isn't anything that's real. Everything on the left is a fraud. Everything on the left is a lie.

Ronald Reagan is the world's largest Muppet.

The best defense against democracy is to distract people.

Quit demagoguing. It's not true.

My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar - I went steady with a woodpecker till I was twenty one.

Hillary's trying to appear downhome. Earlier today she was sitting on the front porch of a general store whittling a pantsuit.

Obamacare is an absolute disaster! And half the country knows it's a disaster because the alternative media read the bill and told you what's in it and gave you the absolute anti-American contents to this piece-of-garbage bill. Half of the country doesn't know what's in it. They think it's free health care because that's what Obama's been out lying to people, you keep your doctor, keep your plan and your premium's coming down $2,500. People were lied to through his teeth. And they believed him.

Model communes are the ones where the leaders lie the best and the biggest.

It is a world of lies that permeates the Left

An ambassador is an honest man sent abroad to lie for his country.

Well, I always talk about how I used to work at an insane asylum and stuff, which is true, but to be honest, I just make crap up more than anything else.

No short-haired, yellow-bellied, son of tricky dicky Is gonna mother hubbard soft soap me With just a pocketful of soap.