Noel Fielding Quotes

A well-tied tie is the first serious step in life.

Wearing a scrap of colored cloth around your neck, even though it serves no useful purpose, but which answers to the name of "tie."

Adrian frowned. 'Is that a noose?' 'It's a tie!' I cried, trying not to feel offended. He laughed, clearly delighted at this. 'My mistake.

I own over four ties.

Vests are flair for men. It's one of the few ways men can accent themselves in a formal yet fun fashion.

I've been taking off my tie for a lot of years. When I take it off, I usually throw it down.

A scarf has to be the most beautiful thing ever invented to wear! It's a winding, a continuity, an infinity! I love things that are endless, I hate them to stop. It's like order and disorder: I rather love disorder and things that move, it's a state where one gets more things done!

If I am occasionally a little over-dressed, I make up for it by being always immensely over-educated.

I don't suppose I can wear the flamingo tie," he said as he pulled on black socks. "It's a bit festive, given the occasion," I responded. "Can't wear it to the opera," said the Colonel, almost smiling. "Can't wear it to a funeral. Can't use it to hang myself. It's a bit useless, as ties go." I gave him a tie.

I'm not a psychopath-I'm wearing a tie!

Belts are only good for holding up your pants

I like putting on a suit. I like putting on a tie.

In the school I went to, they asked a kid to prove the law of gravity and he threw the teacher out of the window.

Sometimes I wake up and I think I should start wearing a beret, but I don't do it. One day I'm gonna, though. You bet your ass, I will have a beret on. That's ridiculous, but it's true. I always fight with wearing a beret.

The doctor looked at my cardiogram and made that "hmmmm" noise that doctors are taught in medical school so they won't come right out and say "UH-oh!"

The last time a straight man worked in the fashion industry, we got a fanny pack.

If law school is so hard to get through... how come there are so many lawyers?

Six Secrets to Being a Successful Humorist 1. Be scared, unhappy, and an outcast as a kid. 2. Drop out of high school. 3. Spend time alone. 4. Don't take a comedy course. 5. Read other humorists but don't worship them. 6. Don't get your hopes up.

When I went to school, sex education was mainly muttered warnings about the janitor.

I'm really silly. That's the thing that people don't get. I think I'm a stronger comedic actress than I am a dramatic actress. I'm not really pigeonholed, but I'm known for drama. I do comedy so easily, and people relate to my humor. I'll be glad because I don't have to stay sexy and young forever. I don't care if I'm big, as long as I'm funny.

Obviously, it's a great privilege and pleasure to be here at the Yale Law School Sesquicentennial Convocation. And I defy anyone to say that and chew gum at the same time.

I'm so glad Courtney Love is here; I left my crack in my other purse.

The only time my education was interrupted was when I was in school.

The white blouse can be light and floating, impeccable and austere, sumptuous and all-enveloping, tight and close-fitting. It rises up to frame the face. It sculpts the body by transforming itself into a second skin. Imputed with glamour and poetry, freedom and impetuousness, the prim white shirt turns out to have a thousand identities.

I was voted Most Humorous in my senior class in high school, and I was a fan of comedy, my whole life. I never got into the horror genre, and action was fine, but I just loved comedy. Any comedy I could get my hands on, I would. I watched Saturday Night Live religiously. I've just been a fan of comedy, my whole life.