Ron White Quotes

I just smoked a Cohiba the other day. It was great. You have to appreciate everything that cigar is.

I'm a cigar aficionado.

Cuban cigars is a big expense because I do smoke a lot of them, eight to 12 a day, so that would be almost as bad as a cocaine habit, a hundred bucks a day.

Aficionado my ass...I just love to smoke cigars

A good smoker, like a good lover, always takes his time with a cigar.

I did the cover of Cigar Aficionado, so I'm supposed to talk about loving cigars. I've smoked them a couple of times. My father used to smoke cigars. I love the idea and the concept, and I love the smell of cigars.

The Canteen Boy, the reason you feel bad for him and you can laugh is because he, and I guess a lot of my characters, they don't notice they're getting made fun of. So they'll say something back that's not that great a quip, but in their mind they won the argument.

I enjoyed being in 'The Ten Commandments.' That was a great experience - to suddenly become one of those holy people. I was holier than thou.

You're the one who likes cigars right? Try smoking this.

I never smoke to excess - that is, I smoke in moderation, only one cigar at a time.

I'm a cigar person, I don't smoke one every day, but I used to smoke them, and I had my own cigar at one time. So, I'm fairly knowledgeable about that.

I like to think I'm a recovering historian.

The most futile and disastrous day seems well spent when it is reviewed through the blue, fragrant smoke of a Havana Cigar.

Only fine cigars are worth smoking and only men who smoke fine cigars are worth kissing.

I smoke cigars because at my age if I don't have something to hang on to I might fall down.

I smoke really good cigars, I don't smoke Cuban cigars. I would never do anything as Un-American as smoke a decent cigar.

There are a million really good cigars, you gotta really float around cigars. It's not like being locked into a brand of cigarettes; at least to me it's not.

When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle. They're on TV!

Throughout my life, cigars have played different roles for me. They fit easily and well in the various stages and experiences Ive had -- like a companion, almost. If youve smoked a long time, as I have, they become part of you.

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror.

Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar.

Do you laugh in the right places? Then, you’ll get along, in fair weather or foul. Humor is nothing less than a sense of the fitness of things. Something that’s out of proportion, like an inflated ego, should strike you funny, particularly if it’s your own inflated ego. Otherwise you are pathetic and quite hopeless.

Unusual weather for New York City. Today it was 68 and foggy. No, wait a minute, that's me. I'm sorry, that's me.

The men who cannot laugh at themselves frighten me even more than those who laugh at everything.

There’s nothing more humbling than seeing your best quotes in a list, and thinking they could have been written by a coma patient with a keyboard and spasms.