Dennis Miller Quotes

I find the closer you get to people, the harder it is to satirise them.

Tolerance is you saying something crazy and me smiling and saying, 'That's nice.'

Don't laugh at a hair joke, Trump.

The president already has a Nobel Prize for peace. I think he's shooting for one in fiction.

I'm trying to feel sorry for you, really I am,"North said."If you wait just a moment I'm sure the tears will come.

Satirize wickedness if you must--but pity weakness.

I love President Bush. I think it's great we have a president who always looks like he's looking directly into the sun.

If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.

At this point, we've ripped on everyone.

It's called political economy because it is has nothing to do with either politics or economy.

I'm glad Reagan is president. Of course, I'm a professional comedian.

Satire is fascinating stuff. It's deadly serious, and when politics begin to break down, there is a drift towards satire, because it's the only thing that makes any sense.

Politics is much too serious to be taken too seriously; equally, there are many aspects of it so laughable as to be lamentable.

Humor brings insight and tolerance. Irony brings a deeper and less friendly understanding.

Some of you may have been hoping that today I would speak about Lucien Bouchard's latest economic theories. But I have decided to spare him for the time being: after all, he is a man.

The other day the President said, I know you've had some rough times, and I want to do something that will show the nation what faith that I have in you, in your maturity and sense of responsibility. He paused, then said, would you like a puppy?

There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.

Mr. Attlee is a very modest man. Indeed he has a lot to be modest about.

When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good?' I said 'No, I made a few mistakes.'

Bad times for the Republic are great times for satire.

We make fun of our leaders.

I've been making fun of Donald Trump - we all have - for 10 years, and just bringing up his name... I mean, even if you're supportive of Donald Trump, there's still a lot to make fun of.

On 'Veep,' people are connecting with each other, even if they're making backhanded comments about somebody behind someone else's back.

Let's Wrestle would rather poke fun than point fingers, even if there's a problem that needs fixing.

Editorial pages all say, 'Well, the other guy has a point, too. It remains to be seen how this will come out. We certainly hope it comes out fine; blah, blah.' Cartoonists don't go that way. Our job is to stick out our tongues, to show a big raspberry to whatever pompous jerk happens to be mouthing off.