Maggie Stiefvater Quotes

Don't get your panties in such a twist... and give me back mine.

You have delighted us long enough.

I've always enjoyed making people laugh. But in order for me to be funny, I have to get ticked off about something.

You know what burns me? Matches.

If I get one more person telling me I look like Eliot Spitzer, I'm just going to have to play the guy one day.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Crankiness is at the essence of all comedy. My wife and I were discussing the different types of cranky. There's entertaining cranky, annoying cranky, angry cranky.

You know, crankiness is at the essence of all comedy.

My brother asked me once, 'Are you a misanthrope?' And I said, 'No, I just find people irritating.'

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Let's stop playing with ourselves and get on with the entertainment, shall we?

Someday I would change my name to Shut Up and save everybody a lot of time.

While watching the New Orleans Saints (on television), I got angry and punched my bed, and then my remote control flew up and hit me in the head. My girlfriend didn't stop laughing for an hour.

Don't ask me any questions right now. I'm grumpy and I'll probablly make fun of you. -Effie Kaligaris

I am out in public and using the phone. I am in a phone booth, got the phone in my hand and a man taps on the glass and says You using the phone? Nope, I'm superman, i am just looking for my costume. Here's your sign!

Sing!" Grandpa Smedry yelled, his voice echoing down a hallway to the right."Sing!" If he breaks into song I think I might have to strangle myself... I thought, cringing.

Don't clap I'm not a jazz band for Christ's sake.

Pray do not interrupt me," he wrote. "I am smiling.

You're Bes, I guess?" I said. "Yes," he said. "Your car's a mess," Liz muttered. "If one more person rhymes," Emma grumbled, "I'll throw up.

Well, that's a 'fresher'. I'm going on break.

Benedick looked to the ceiling as though begging for divine patience. Or for the Lord to strike his sister down. Callie couldn’t quite discern which.

Call me bored, but don't call me boring.

Oh, lighten up, Clark. I'm the one having scalding hot air directed at my genitals.

Next time I’ll just send the three of you e-mails. What was I thinking when I decided to have this meeting? (Acheron) Oh, I know. That men who are a couple of thousand years old could actually behave like grownups? (Nick) (Zarek elbowed Nick in the stomach.) Oops. Involuntary arm spasm. (Zarek)

"Hello, Max," he said quietly, searching my face. "How do you feel?" Which was a ten on the 'imbecilic question' scale of one to ten. "Why, I feel fine, Jeb," I said brightly. "How about you?" "Any nausea? Headache?" "Yep. And it's standing here talking to me."