George Carlin Quotes

I see that a man cannot give himself up to drinking without being miserable one half his days and mad the other.

Stay away from drugs. They're not worth it. I've tried, but there's none of them that's worth it.

Liquor will actually make a brute out of a Negro, causing him to commit unnatural crimes. The effect is the same on the white man, though the white man being further evolved it takes a longer time to reduce him to the same level.

The benefit of drinking alcohol is very minimal and the harm of it is as bad as what a knife can do.

Refrain from drink which is the source of all evil--and the ruin of half the workmen in this Country.

After all is said that can be said upon the liquor traffic, its influence is degrading upon the individual, the family, politics and business, and upon everything that you touch in this old world

Even if you've gone easy on the vermouth, there are still serious downsides to alcohol consumption, including but not limited to the sense that you're a good dancer.

I don't think girls realize that alcohol is just the worst for the skin.

God slaps you around a little bit when you drink too much.

I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest: "Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.

Drink, sir, is a great provoker of three things . . . nose-painting, sleep, and urine. Lechery, sir, it provokes, and unprovokes; it provokes the desire, but it takes away the performance.

The more people smoke herb, the more Babylon fall.

You come home, and you party. But after that, you get a hangover. Everything about that is negative.

If you are young and you drink a great deal it will spoil your health, slow your mind, make you fat - in other words, turn you into an adult.

Drugs are a waste of time. They destroy your memory and your self-respect and everything that goes along with with your self-esteem. They're no good at all.

Liquor perverts the end of society, and unfits us for all those distinguishing and exquisite Feelings, which are the Cordials of Life, and the noblest Privileges of Humanity.

All drugs are a waste of time. They destroy your memory and your self-respect and everything that goes along with your self-esteem. They’re no good at all. But I’m not going to go around preaching against them.

First the man takes a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes the man.

There is held to be no surer test of civilization than the increase per head of the consumption of alcohol and tobacco. Yet alcohol and tobacco are recognizable poisons, so that their consumption has only to be carried far enough to destroy civilization altogether.

Drunkenness was extremely common… It seemed for many the only refuge from depression and misery. The effect of drunkenness upon the ordinary relationship of husband and wife, parents and children, was disastrous.

Ardent spirits [injured] the health, morals [and] economy of the community.

The Effects of Ardent Spirits Upon Man

While the collateral consequences of drugs such as cocaine are indisputably severe, they are not unlike those which flow from the misuse of other, legal, substances

A man should be able to have a whiskey in the evening without jeopardizing his health

No one should do drugs thinking that they will make a great record. That's not the way to go, for sure.