Tia Carrere Quotes

I broke my nose in gym when a ball hit me. I took a girl to her debutante ball the next week wearing a tux and a big, honking bandage. Not the romantic night she had in mind.

Everybody laughs when fatty falls down.

My first course came and I put down my book, and I just happened to put up my hand to scratch my head and discovered that my toupee had been blown by the wind and was folded over backwards on the top of my head!

Having rain on your tuxedo is a pretty good reminder that you're not James Bond.

I was singing in a mall, and I picked a girl to come up onstage with me. As I was grabbing her hand, I fell off the stage. It felt like I was in the air forever, flying like Superman.

Whenever I've had a wig fall off, I've just played it off like I meant it to happen. Just keep a good sense of humor about it.

The worst was when my skirt fell down to my ankles, but I had on thick tights underneath.

The only way to amuse some people is to slip and fall on an icy pavement.

My problem is people seem to laugh at me, but the one that laughs harder than anybody is me.

I go to the gym in a baseball cap, sweats and then run into a boy I like. It happens - so what?

I always like stories where the egg ends up on my face.

Somebody ripped their pants open at my wedding, dipping my mother. My mother is not a lady who throws herself into a dip that often, so I don't think he thought she was really going to do it.

I had one particular handbag disaster when I couldn't get into it, and when I finally did, it flew over the red carpet and was caught by 200 lenses. Not a great moment.

I do things, and other people laugh at them. I rarely know what the joke is supposed to be or why they're laughing.

Somebody who never got over the embarrassing fact that he was born in bed with a lady.

When I was starring as Roxie Hart in 'Chicago,' I got my stiletto heel caught in my fishnet tights and fell flat on my face. It was incredibly painful and not something you can cover up.

America is a large friendly dog in a small room. Every time it wags its tail it knocks over a chair.

That incident ruined my reputation for 10 years. Get one Beatle drunk and look what happens!

Baldness is visually enough of a stigma as it is without a big sweaty bloke on stage pointing it out.

When I become the village idiot, or at least, it starts to become a joke, you can't do that much longer.

To my embarrassment I was born in bed with a lady.

I was on stage with Cyndi Lauper, and my trousers split. It seemed like she was going to sing for ever.

There are so many things that can go wrong while performing. I've had violin strings break; I've had pants that were slowly falling down, and I'd have to pull them up in between every song; my hairpiece was falling out, so a big chunk of hair was just flapping around as I danced, and I've completely fallen on my butt.

I go through my comments sometimes, and I'll just take snapshots of the terrible ones and send them to my friends. I know it's horrible, but they actually make me laugh. They make my day.

I remember, my very first day at a new school, a bird pooped all down my back. It was like any other day of school except everyone was like, 'Oh my God, you're from the movie 'Big Daddy,'' and I had bird poop all over me.