W. C. Fields Quotes

The whole religious complexion of the modern world is due to the absence from Jerusalem of a lunatic asylum.

I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy.

Christianity has made more lunatics than it ever provided asylums for.

Part of her doing suicide intervention is my caseworker has to mix me another gin and tonic.

I went to Columbia University because they were doing a study on people who suffered from panic attacks, and because I suffered from panic attacks my whole life, I decided to be a part of it. They had this questionnaire where they asked, How many units of alcohol do you have in a month? The top answer was 40 or more, and I got really scared because I was having on average 60 or 70 drinks a week. And I realized that that was a bad sign.

True, you don't have to be religious to be crazy, but it helps.

So much progress has been made with topics like mental illness and drug abuse and sexual identity.

I was getting depressed, I was going out, having a few drinks and the worst thing you can do with depression is add alcohol to it.

Sometimes people go into my business because they like to drink, which - that's insane.

Homelessness, open air drug use and mental illness - which we all see in this city - are things we've been relying on the DA's office and the jails to deal with. That's really expensive, inhumane and ineffective.

The war on drugs is very, very real, and the war on helping people with mental illness is very, very real.

I wasn't taking drugs or drinking. I was working and working and working. But I wasn't writing anything.

The plan was to drink until the pain is over, But what's worse, the pain or the hangover?

I'm drinking lots of rum and popping pinks and greys.

True, you don't have to be religious to be crazy, but it helps. Indeed, if you are religious, you don't have to be crazy in the medically certifiable sense in order to do massively crazy things.

My advice to you is to start drinking heavily.

The wages of Gin is Debt.

Maybe some folks are alcoholics and others are just voluntary drunks. Maybe some folks drink due to body chemistry and others due to their lazy characters. Maybe some have drinking problems, while others have problems enough to drink.

Wherever on earth the religious neurosis has appeared we find it tied to three dangerous dietary demands: solitude, fasting, and sexual abstinence.

Drinking isn't necessarily the same as wanting to die. But you can't drink without thinking you're killing yourself.

But even Es and cocaine, over the years they blow holes in your brain, rob you of your memories, your past. Which is fair enough, convenient even.

Religious creeds encourage some of the craziest kinds of thoughts, emotions, and behaviors and favor severe manifestations of neurosis, borderline personality states, and sometimes even psychosis.

A man may take to drink because he feels himself to be a failure, but then fail all the more completely because he drinks.

I drank, smoked and did drugs to get where I'm at.

Any inhibition must be wrong, since inevitably in the end it causes neurosis and insanity.