Paul Reiser Quotes

I love children. I'm embarrassingly baby-crazy.

Of children as of procreation -- the pleasure momentary, the posture ridiculous, the expense damnable

A pregnant woman and her spouse dream of three babies--the perfect four-month-old who rewards them with smiles and musical cooing,the impaired baby, who changes each day, and the mysterious real baby whose presence is beginning to be evident in the motions of the fetus.

The more boring a child is, the more the parents, when showing off the child, receive adulation for being good parents — because they have a tame child-creature in their house.

People often ask me, "What's the difference between couplehood and babyhood?" In a word? Moisture. Everything in my life is now more moist. Between your spittle, your diapers, your spit-up and drool, you got your baby food, your wipes, your formula, your leaky bottles, sweaty baby backs, and numerous other untraceable sources-all creating an ever-present moistness in my life, which heretofore was mainly dry.

Before Kady was born, I didn't think having a kid would be such a big deal. My attitude was simple: Babies are nice, play with them, put them in the closet until the next time.

Granny bit her lip. She was never quite certain about children, thinking of them-when she thought about them at all-as coming somewhere between animals and people. She understood babies. You put milk in one end and kept the other as clean as possible. Adults were even easier, because they did the feeding and cleaning themselves. But in between was a world of experience that she had never really inquired about. As far as she was aware, you just tried to stop them catching anything fatal and hoped that it would all turn out all right.

I totally want, like, 18 babies.

I absolutely want to have children, whether I have my own or adopt.

I got a feeling that when I have kids, I'm going to have a little girl, and she's going to be completely sensible.

I think babies are a bit boring, actually. They're OK when they're older; they make you laugh. I think we all think that, really - we just don't say it.

My sister has three kids so I've spent a lot of time around children and I've always really liked them and wanted my own. It's cool because you think all babies are the same but they aren't at all. They all have such different personalities. It's crazy.

I have very little patience with children.

I've noticed that since I've been pregnant I see babies everywhere. I love talking to them. I never used to really like kids that much. I guess it comes out of you naturally.

Fathers and mothers have lost the idea that the highest aspiration they might have for their children is for them to be wise... specialized competence and success are all that they can imagine.

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can boss them around.

Parenting is not for everybody. It changes your life. Especially when they're little.

Clearly, society has a tremendous stake in insisting on a woman's natural fitness for the career of mother: the alternatives are all too expensive.

I've always wanted to be a dad. I just can't wait to have a little rug rat running around. I used to want five or six kids, but maybe I've become too self-absorbed over the years. I think two would be perfect.

No, I've never wanted kids. But I do read about parenting a lot.

Those children who have been most chastised seldom make the best men.

… men never think, at least seldom think, what a hard task it is for us women to go through this [childbirth] very often. God's will be done, and if He decrees that we are to have a great number of children, why we must try to bring them up as useful and exemplary members of society.

My little one's only 12 and I miss seeing him grow up and trying to form him and mould him the way I'd like him to him to turn out, which is something like his dad!

I loved having children and started relatively late.