Joseph Heller Quotes

In an insane world, sanity made very little sense.

There was only one catch and that was Catch22, which specified that a concern for one's safety in the face of dangers that were real and immediate was the process of a rational mind. Orr was crazy and could be grounded. All he had to do was ask, and as soon as he did, he would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions. Orr would be crazy to fly more missions and sane if he didn't, but if he was sane he had to fly them. If he flew them he was crazy and didn't have to; but if he didn't want to he was sane and had to.

There's a rule saying I have to ground anyone who's crazy ... There's a catch. Catch-22. Anyone who wants to get out of combat duty isn't really crazy.

You can and you can't You will and you won't You'll be damned if you do You'll be damned if you don't

A double bind is far worse than a straightforward damned-if-you-do, damned-if-you-don't dilemma. It requires you to obey two mutually exclusive commands: Anything you do to fulfill one violates the other.

Sometimes I think that if I wasn't crazy... I'd go crazy.

Our occasional madness is less wonderful than our occasional sanity.

Are we, then, insane because we have not gone mad?

Stated clearly enough, an idea may cancel itself out.

If you run for mayor, people say you're being egotistical. If you decide you won't run for mayor, people say you're being self-centered and egotistical.

The definition of insanity in Texas is so insane that it's impossible to be insane in Texas.

In a mad world, only the mad are sane.

I don't really trust a sane person.

If one were to take the bible seriously one would go mad. But to take the bible seriously, one must be already mad.

It's hard to find logic in things sometimes. That's why I can't analyze things too much, because it often doesn't make much sense.

Ultimately, it's a pretty confusing moment.

If you follow reason far enough it always leads to conclusions that are contrary to reason.

There is only one difference between a madman and me. The madman thinks he is sane. I know I am mad.

'But I don't want to go among mad people,' said Alice. 'Oh, you can't help that,' said the cat. 'We're all mad here.'

But I like schlocky violent movies, but I'm for strict gun control. But then there was a time I was at a laser tag place, and I had such a good time hiding in a corner shooting at people. In other words, I'm your basic confused human when it comes to violence.

A man speaking sense to himself is no madder than a man speaking nonsense not to himself.

The wise men were all fools, what to do?

If I am Sophocles, I am not mad; and if I am mad, I am not Sophocles.

You'll be "damned if you do, and damned if you don't."

Who then is sane? He who is not a fool.