Chris Rock Quotes

You know, Jesse Jackson is just trying to stir up a hornet's nest.

All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.

Satire is fascinating stuff. It's deadly serious, and when politics begin to break down, there is a drift towards satire, because it's the only thing that makes any sense.

When I was at 'SNL,' I would constantly get in arguments, 'Why aren't we more political? We're not going after Bush.' Then look what happened - that Sarah Palin season, they were on fire. It was about something.

And realising that humour is the most powerful way to make a political statement and say the things that you want to say. And it's not used enough, at least not in the U.S.

I know these jokes aren't great, ladies and gentlemen, see this is the problem you run into when you're between impeachments.

I've always been interested in socially political, or overtly political, comedy.

Could you imagine me and the roasters taking on the GOP field? It would be the greatest show ever. Prove that you can take a joke. Prove that you're a man or woman of the people. Prove that you're not above criticism even in the form of a backhanded compliment.

One of my movies was called 'True Lies.' It's what the Democrats should have called their convention.

Whoever's president I'm not going to be short on material.

May you be as rich as a Republican and have the sex life of a Democrat.

My whole career has been an Ann Coulter roast.

When I see the hatred exacted at Mr. Obama - you know, he lowered your taxes, killed your number one bad guy and got your guys out of Iraq - I don't understand why he seems to inflame people so much. You know, unless, unless there's a race problem.

When it comes to music, we should be hoping for as outlandish a Republican candidate as we can get.

People go, 'Oh, Trump must be good for comedy,' and I go, 'Ehhh.'

I stay far away from political humor.

Larry Flynt, running for governor of California. His goal - change our state bird to the spread eagle.

[If Donald Trump does get elected, I will be] probably Secretary Of Reeducation. Or I don't know. I'll probably end up working in the cafeteria.

Osama bin Laden was living in that compound with three wives. It's like he was Newt Gingrich.

Uhh Gosh, I.. don't think I ever said I'm not worried about Osama bin Laden. It's kind of one of those, uhh, exaggerations.

Mr. Bibbit, you might warn this Mr. Harding that I'm so crazy I admit to voting for Eisenhower. Bibbit! You tell Mr. McMurphy I'm so crazy I voted for Eisenhower twice! And you tell Mr. Harding right back — he puts both hands on the table and leans down, his voice getting low — that I'm so crazy I plan to vote for Eisenhower again this November.

In an interview, Hillary Clinton said she likes nearly every flavor of ice cream. When he heard this, Chris Christie said 'Hey, she stole my speech.'

If you vote for Democrats, you might as well give Al Quaeda a death ray and a manual.

As for Gordon Brown - I've described him and Blair as two cheeks of the same arse.

A year ago, my approval rating was in the 30s, my nominee for the supreme court had just withdrawn, and my vice president had shot someone. Ah, those were the good old days.