Jonathan Swift Quotes

Punning is an art of harmonious jingling upon words, which, passing in at the ears, excites a titillary motion in those parts; and this, being conveyed by the animal spirits into the muscles of the face, raises the cockles of the heart.

It requires genius to make a good pun - some men of bright parts can't reach it.

I tried to think of a witty play on Every picture tells a thousand words, but then the whole word/picture thing collapsed on me.

Puns are the highest form of literature.

Puns are the droppings of soaring wits.

I'm a terrible punster. And I love to rhyme. I just can't help myself.

I do not, in fact, use many puns. Certainly there are far fewer than people believe. But I suspect the ones I do occasionally use tend to hang around in people's memories for a while.

I'm probably doing puns more than anything in my life.

I think the humor of double puns is incredible.

I wish my name was Brian because maybe sometimes people would misspell my name and call me Brain. That's like a free compliment and you don't even gotta be smart to notice it.

I'm shameless, and I love a pun. There's a lot of Beth puns.

If you compulsively pun you are called a paronomasiac.

Of puns it has been said that those who most dislike them are those who are least able to utter them.

A pun, though despicable in itself, can be the noblest vehicle of an artistic intention by serving as the abbreviation of a wittyview. It can be a social criticism in the form of an epigram.

I never knew an enemy to puns who was not an ill-natured man.

There is no kind of false wit which has been so recommended by the practice of all ages, as that which consists in a jingle of words, and is comprehended under the general name of punning.

Puns are little "plays on words" that a certain breed of person loves to spring on you and then look at you in a certain self-satisfied way to indicate that he thinks that you must think that he is by far the cleverest person on Earth now that Benjamin Franklin is dead, when in fact what you are thinking is that if this person ever ends up in a lifeboat, the other passengers will hurl him overboard by the end of the first day even if they have plenty of food and water.

My puns are not trivial. They are quadrivial

There is a single entendre, but I don't know about a triple one.

George Carlin is brilliant with words, and Johnny Winters is very creative. It's taking something common and drawing out the humor, being clever with words.

Puns are a form of humor with words.

Humor writing is something that comes naturally to me.

I'm really great at making terrible analogies.

I live and die by puns.

I think if you're trying to be funny, sometimes you're bending a piece of metal in a direction it doesn't want to go. And sometimes comedy just needs to find itself.