The wisest and the best of men, nay, the wisest and best of their actions, may be rendered ridiculous by a person whose first object in life is a joke.
I have to have people around who are of a certain strain of humour. I can't deal with people who have no humour.
I just wanted laughs - that's really what I was after.
I wanted to be clever, but being funny came first. That's how you know someone is clever. They don't come out and tell you pi to 13 places - they tell you a joke.
The distrust of wit is the beginning of tyranny.
I'm a very observational type of comedian that points out everyday absurdities.
A joke is a very serious thing.
If you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything.
Laughter springs from the lawless part of our nature.
Against the assault of laughter, nothing can stand.
If you're going to tell people the truth, be funny or they'll kill you.
Comedy is all about the pause.
The greater the stupidity, the greater the clarity. Stupidity is brief and guileless, while wit equivocates and hides. Wit is a scoundrel, while stupidity is honest and sincere.
I've been on the tour for 23 years and anybody who knows me knows that I am a jokester.
I've spent my entire career being a satirist.
People who live in an age of corruption are witty and slanderous; they know that there are other kinds of murder than by dagger or assault; they also know that whatever is well said is believed.
You say you're a comedian, you always have to be on guard.
As it is the characteristic of great wits to say much in few words, so small wits seem to have the gift of speaking much and saying nothing.
My greatest regret as a writer is that I've never been able to include as many jokes as I'd like.
Humor is the ultimate truth. If it’s not true, the joke is not funny.
I have a lot of respect for actors who do comedy. They do it naturally.
How long does it take to make 'They Think It's All Over?' It's just laughing at each other and thinking, 'Aren't we clever?'
You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice.
I'm fascinated by comedy.
I always told everybody the perfect joke would be where the setup and punch line were identical.
