Delivery Quotes

Comedy is all about the pause.

You say you're a comedian, you always have to be on guard.

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these faithful couriers from the swift accomplishment of their appointed rounds.

There are no excuses for theoretical physicists not to perform and deliver.

A politician and a government should be judged by one way only: on the record of what you do or did, not on what you say.

My mother giving birth to me was just like Lady Sybil giving birth, except that there wasn't such a tragic ending.

Look at my record - I always bring a finish.

Don't tell your kids you had an easy birth or they won't respect you. For years I used to wake up my daughter and say, 'Melissa you ripped me to shreds. Now go back to sleep.'.

Beyond any role that I ever had, really early on as a stand-up, I would see actors decide to try it and they would bomb miserably. What I realized was that stand-up, acting and writing are all their own disciplines.

It's very interesting, the joke comes first and then the wording comes within five seconds, maybe ten seconds. My thing is to get the joke across in as few words as possible. However, sometimes a word that's not really needed does help the rhythm of it. It's a gut feeling.

Success depends on three things: who says it, what he says, how he says it; and of these three things, what he says is the least important.

It's really the tone that people use to convey things sometimes that can either become a compliment or an insult. It's not always what you are saying, it's about how you say it.

You gotta have a schedule, you gotta have a team that's passionate about seeing you do the things you say you wanna do. When it comes to delivering this, it takes a lot of work and I can't do that on my own.

A lot of times when I sit down with the other comics and try to talk theory, they say I'm being too serious.

Humor is like music. It's a rhythm, and you just kind of get the rhythm of it, and you have to know not to let the beat go too long, but to leave a beat in there for it to gel.

I am not a joke-teller. Stand-up, I couldn't do.

There's this little recipe that you have to hit pretty well to get somebody to laugh. And it's a combination of the way in which you say something, with the facial expression that you have, married with the body language that you have, etc.

Yet through delivery orators succeed, I feel that I am far behind indeed.

Stand-up is hard.

Being on 'The Office' prepared me for drama. Comedy got me ready, but once you get down to it, they're two sides of the same thing. I mean, the delivery has to be different - in drama, there's more time to breathe, and comedy's all about hitting the joke.

If you come across as boring or monotone, you're going to lose your audience.

Almost anything can be funny if said the right way - but it has to be said the right way.

Sometimes the writing can be so good that the actor doesn't really have to do anything.

When Demosthenes was asked what was the first part of Oratory, he answered, "Action," and which was the second, he replied, "action," and which was the third, he still answered "Action.

You can't find a bad count to throw a curveball.