Tina Fey Quotes

Everyone always says, 'Kristen got 'Panic Room' because she looks like Jodie Foster.' But it was actually Nicole Kidman who was supposed to play my mother.

Making movies was a real weird kind of adult experience. In a way it was like MIT, in that it was a great education. The big lesson is, people are people. They're smart, funny, creative people, but they're people.

The guys on the stunt team are really fantastic. It's really funny, because for all the aggression they have to display on screen, they're actually really happy, good- natured people.

If I wasn't a film-maker, I'd be a film critic. It's the only thing I'd be qualified to do.

I know the nature of comedy, and you never know what will happen with the next movie or whether people will find it funny.

I would love to do comedy. I think I'm funny and that comedy is my strong suit, at least in real life. I have yet to prove myself in the movies, but I'd love to get the opportunity to do that.

It's so funny, actors usually have a directing ambition. I've got no ambition for directing.

My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings.

Some movie I was in, I forget which one, some awful little movie, a reviewer said, What is Jessica Walter doing in this movie? And I said, Hello? Trying to make a living?

I wanted very much to do Traffic and at one point it looked like I was going to work on it. And then, of course, Catherine Zeta-Jones had her relationship with Michael Douglas and it suddenly didn't happen.

I remember the early 1980s, when I first got one of these fabulous film critic jobs. The downside was sitting through 'Splatteria III: The Dismembering of the Clampett Clan' or 'The Oklahoma Meatgrinder Massacre' or some such. The headaches unleashed by watching attractive kids die week after week after week cannot be imagined.

I really don't know what happened in reference to 'The Butler.' Mr. Daniels and I had a conversation. I had the script, the email that goes along with it in reference to the character, read the script, loved it. Then I never heard from Mr. Daniels again, and the next I saw was that Oprah Winfrey is now playing the part.

It's a required part of your film history to know who Woody is. His movies are so wonderful, and not just funny but so insightful about human behavior.

I did 'Love's Labour's Lost' in the theater and found it to be riotously funny.

James Caan told me at the end of filming 'Elf' that he had been waiting through the whole film for me to be funny - and I never was.

Some people just want to make up the funny things and play pretend.

I tried to get Steven Seagal for my 'Stepfather Factory' video in 2002.

Peter Falk and Denis Leary today walked into a Starbucks and shot 27 people, without any announcement whatsoever.

The National Association of Theater Concessionaires reported that in 1986, 60% of all candy sold in movie theaters was sold to Roger Ebert.

Kittens play with yarn, they bat it around. What they're really doing is saying, "I can't knit, get this away from me!"

I got to play a funny part [in the The Master Of Disguise]. There was one thing my character did that involved flatulence and laughing at the same time - that was in the script - and that was basically what sold me on it. I really thought, "This can't help but be funny." And when I saw the film, I was proud that I'd had those moments.

I play a guy who is 40. And I am a very good actor, because I'm 41.

I handed in a script last year and the studio didn't change one word. The word they didn't change was on page 87.

My good intentions are completely lethal.

The trouble with this business is the dearth of bad pictures.