Darrell Hammond Quotes

Bill Clinton's foreign policy experience stems mainly from having breakfast at the International House of Pancakes.

I don't think the United States has done anything whatsoever to merit any criticism by the British.

My diplomatic position will not consist of going and kneeling down in front of George Bush.

I'd like to hire Hillary Clinton. She looks unhappy at the State Department. She'd get ratings.

I'm not some ditzy moron who has no idea how to deal with a diplomat as if they're some exotic animal.

Sarah Palin gave a speech in South Korea. Just what the Koreans needed: Two crazy dictators in fashionable lady's glasses.

This morning President Obama met with Britain's Prince William in the Oval Office. It was a meeting between a symbolic ruler with no real power and the future king of England.

I was working with a number of African heads of state. And after their initial surprise, I think many of them just treated me as they would anybody else. They had to deal with me as a representative of the United States of America, and the United States of America was too important to be dismissed or ignored on any grounds.

The limits of diplomacy must be acknowledged.

A pupil of diplomacy has to learn three things: to speak French, to speak nothing, and to speak falsehood.

When the President picks up the phone and calls the Prime Minister, what does it mean to be an ambassador?

If we start seeing one ambassador I don’t know how we’re going to avoid seeing the other 113 …. I don’t see what mileage we get in seeing 80 African ambassadors.

Cool, realistic diplomats are prepared to try to negotiate with any type of regime whenever the national interest calls for it; the last thing that should ever be done to turn emotional or "demonize" another foreign leader no matter how nasty he may be.

Ambassadors are the eyes and ears of states.

I'm convinced there's a small room in the attic of the Foreign Office where future diplomats are taught to stammer

The diplomat sits in silence, watching the world with his ears.

We have normal relations with lots of countries whose leadership we do not like..

Bill Clinton’s only experience with foreign policy is the fact that he had breakfast at the International House of Pancakes.

If you wanted to hear politics, you'd go to Henry Kissinger; you wouldn't go to hear Jackie Mason. The reason I speak about politics is because I know I can get a laugh out of it.

Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does it to somebody else. This is the idea behind foreign policy.

I do believe that it's very frequent that officials from foreign governments will meet with members of Congress. They will meet with folks associated with campaigns. That's not aberrational here in Washington.

Personal relations were critical to the success of dad's diplomacy all across the world during his presidency.

There is no way to expect one ambassador to cover all of the U.S. government's priority issues, and certainly there are a plethora of U.N. meetings that drag on with an unlimited number of speakers and no time limits.

Bernie Sanders has never asked me, but I'm just saying if he did ask me to pray for him, I would.

The topic of Sarah Palin has been open season to the media, entertainment industry, and club comics alike.