Lewis Black Quotes

I don't usually admire Sarah Palin, but when she was making fun of this 'hopey changey stuff,' she was right: there was nothing there.

So, you know, I actually don't think it's going to be that hard to spread the message to people that their leadership - not alone John Cornyn, but including John Cornyn in a big way - is failing us.

I wouldn't call the Prime Minister gutless. That's all that's left of him.

Bush is an idiot and he's President, so anything's possible

I hear these people saying [Barack Obama]'s like George Bush. Those people ought to be drug tested. I mean, it's crazy.

George Bush and his gang imagine they are being political geniuses.

You keep wondering whether people will see that Barack Obama is a liar and not very bright.

Take our politicians: they're a bunch of yo-yos. The presidency is now a cross between a popularity contest and a high school debate, with an encyclopedia of cliches.

You may say I may be unfit to be mayor. But you can never say I'm an unfit mayor.

Obama's not Jesus. He can't walk on water.

There's no way you can win when you're the president; you've got to be the scapegoat for America's issues.

George Bush doesn't represent any civilization!

The majority of Americans, the ones who never elected George W. Bush, are not fooled by his weapons of mass distraction.

Look, when you're the president, there's all kinds of things said about us. I mean, it's just the nature of the job.

I'm the guy everybody wanted to live next door. They just didn't want me to be prime minister.

Could you imagine me and the roasters taking on the GOP field? It would be the greatest show ever. Prove that you can take a joke. Prove that you're a man or woman of the people. Prove that you're not above criticism even in the form of a backhanded compliment.

Governor Blanco is like Packman without the looks.

I didn't think [Canadian Prime Minister John] Diefenbaker was a son of a bitch. I thought he was a prick.

I never met a politician that I couldn’t take a poke at.

The art of leading the vulgar, in itself, does no discredit to its practitioner. Lincoln practiced it unashamed, and so did Webster, Clay, and Henry. What is more, these men practiced it with frank allowance for the naïveté of the people they presumed to lead.

Senator Obama has been saying some pretty nasty things about Western Pennsylvania lately, and you know, I couldn’t agree with him more.

Thank you, Mr. President, for hosting us and giving me the chance to be with so many people I haven’t voted for.

Our job is to bash the President.

A woman said to me, 'You're better than your successor.' She then said she's lived under 10 prime ministers, and each was worse than the last. That put me in my place.

We make fun of our leaders.