Alexa Chung Quotes

She said, 'I'm your biggest fan,' and I said, 'Who are you?' She said, 'Paris Hilton.'

Everybody is wondering what Paris Hilton will be doing next, and hell, I'm wondering what she did before.

There's enough people that do unfunny music. I'll leave the serious stuff to Paris Hilton and Kevin Federline.

On the red carpet, I'm playing a character. As soon as I get off that thing, I think, 'Oof, wipe that gloss off.' I'm wiping and wiping and pulling my hair out and trying to change my outfit. I'm immediately trying to get comfortable. It's really a part I play.

I'm loving saying 'I'm not a big movie star, but I play one on television.'

They say Yogi Berra is funny. Well, he has a lovely wife and family, a beautiful home, money in the bank, and he plays golf with millionaires. What's funny about that?

Pretty Woman was the easiest job I've ever done. I just wore the right toupee.

When I present those clip shows and movie mistakes and things, the persona the writers adopt for me is unimpressed, superior, very sarcastic - I'm not any of that. I can do it, but that's not what I'm like.

I always approach every role through a lens of comedy.

I once hosted the Butcher Shop of the Year Awards. There's nothing like performing to the personification of the phrase a 'sausage fest' to hammer home how you've hit the big time.

And that's when he finally tells me his name is Ernest. I'm thinking of giving it away, though. Ernest is so dull, and Hemingway? Who wants a Hemingway?

Britney Spears told an interviewer if she weren't famous, she would be a teacher. So thank God she's famous.

I don't think it's ever easy to be funny. I find it easy to amuse myself with a certain sort of cynical dark humor that tends toward the meaner side, like my character in Happy Gilmore. Those kinds of characters come easily to me.

Obviously, I'm a fan of satire. I'd debate anyone, but it would have to be the actual person. That would be my only hesitation about debating Stephen Colbert. If he were playing a character, it wouldn't really work.

Eww," Jack said, and then giggled. "Yeah, and a Paris Hilton doll that had an optional brain."Aphrodite raised her brow at him. "Don't go all crazy. There are some things even Paris Hilton can't buy.

I can be much more sarcastic and, I think, sometimes withering in my assessments of things than I allow to show in my public life.

Sometimes I think people are famous because they're themselves and they do a role and you see them do it.

Slim Shady is just the evil thoughts that come into my head. Things I shouldn't be thinking about. Not to be gimmicky, but people should be able to determine when I'm serious and when I'm f... around. That's why a lot of my songs are funny. I got a warped sense of humor I guess.

I just do little jokes all the time and people think I'm serious. I know exactly who Gordon Ramsay is, I know exactly who Gordon Brown is... I just say jokes but they think I'm serious which I think is funny and I think I kind of play up the image sometimes because - whatever - it's just entertainment.

With the latitude of unbounded scurrility, it is easy enough to attain the character of a wit, especially when it is considered how wonderfully pleasant it is to the generality of the public to see the folly of their acquaintance exposed by a third person.

A pun is the lowest form of humor—when you don't think of it first.

Nothing's true that I say, because I don't really want to say anything. I don't think my life's that cool, and I don't think my opinion's that valid. They're just silly jokes. Usually I just take a topic that isn't funny at all, like Shakespeare, and work backwards. I just try to find an unfunny subject.

What happens, I think, is especially for comic effect you find something about yourself that you don't like. You exaggerate it, and it's funny.

As a comedian, I think we all look for those areas where the truth diverts from what people are saying. That's why politics is such a rich area for us, because politicians make promises, and they don't keep them, and when we point out the difference, we get the laugh.

I think stand-up comedy is this - it's this kind of indulgence and narcissism.