Jim Gaffigan Quotes

I am telling you to be a slow-speaking person.

I don't get many hecklers now but answering them is an art form in itself.

I get hecklers all the time!

Japan is quite weird because they wait for you to say something before they respond. You can literally hear a pin drop, they don't make a sound until you say something to the crowd.

I've had to work on being a slow talker.

I don't like to be the only person talking in a room.

I can deal with people who watch me on stage but I am not good in communicating with people any other way than through my work.

I'm not, like, a gregarious guy. I don't walk into a room and want to engage people. I'm just not wired that way. One on one, I'm fine.

Not only am I a shy person, I take a little while to say what I mean, especially in a social situation, and usually those move too fast for me to say anything at all.

I think, like, in real life, I'm actually quiet, and I mumble a lot. But that's not very lucrative.

I am not comfortable, being in the limelight and I think that's fine. When I have to, I talk. Otherwise, I prefer not to.

If I am with one person, I am very talkative, and personable. I will talk your ear off, but if there is another person interjected, I get so awkward. I am like the awkward one in those situations, but I feel like a lot of creative people are.

I've always spoken very quickly, and when I get nervous, I talk even faster.

It's this weird thing that I always feel like I have to gauge in myself, like, "Don't come on too strong because you won't get your way."

My timing is so precise, a heckler would have to make an appointment just to get a word in.

You can tell how nervous I am by how fast I am talking!

Most people, when they talk fast, they get flat.

It is not so much the content of what one says as the way in which one says it. However important the thing you say, what's the good of it if not heard or, being heard, not felt?

I have to get way more vocal and become a little bit less mysterious.

Somewhat predictably, I'm much more comfortable in front of an audience - and a big audience is even better - than faced with one stranger. This always seems like a bit of a failing on my part, as a human. I think that's also why I put myself situations where I'm forced to engage in other ways.

Remember that how you say something is as important as what you say.

One of the things I think about with Donald Trump is what are his words actually attached to? With Trump, I'm not sure the words have roots. They are emanations of his psyche, but has he thought it through? Is there an argument, is there a policy implication?

there are two ways of speaking an audience will always like: one is, to tell them what they don't understand; and the other is, to tell them what they're used to.

There was one thing I was never going to do--no way: preach at a crusade!

I'm not sure I can think of any scenario more enjoyable than making 55,000 people from New York shut up.