Fred Allen Quotes

He was so narrow minded, he could see thru a keyhole with both eyes.

I wanted to make a film about stupid people that was very vulgar and deeply stupid. From that moment on I can hardly be reproached for making a film that is about stupid people.

In a satire, you need foolishness.

You can reach stupidity only with a cannon ball.

Exactly. They're stupid. Who cares?" "I care. They bother me. And that's why I'm stupid. That makes me exponentially more stupid than stupid. I'm stupid to the power of stupid." She waved her hand. The moon blew away. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard." I looked at her out of the corner of my eye.

Your stupidity is appalling!" "Most stupidity is!

The stupidest man I ever met had a favourite saying. It was: 'What do you think I am, stupid, or something?’

It's a challenge to do satire when the thing you're satirizing is almost beyond satire, but I think that's a challenge for everybody.

Truly, there's no alternative to stupidity. Cretinism is the mother of fascism. I have no defence against it, really....

They aren't the brightest crayons in the box -Max(saving the world and other extreme sports)

Stupidity assumes two forms, it speaks or is silent. Mute stupidity is bearable.

Stubbornness and stupidity are twins.

I haven't laughed so much over anything since the hogs ate my kid brother.

It's usually easier to rouse stupidity to action than to arouse wisdom to effort, for wisdom sees alternatives while stupidity lacks the imagination to do this. All sinister interests in a country can depend ultimately upon the strength of stupidity.

Poetic simile was strictly limited to statements like 'his mighty steed was as fleet as the wind on a fairly calm day, say about Force Three,' and any loose talk about a beloved having a face that launched a thousand ships would have to be backed by evidence that the object of desire did indeed look like a bottle of champagne.

The folly of others is ever most ridiculous to those who are themselves most foolish.

Stupidity is always astounding, no matter how often one encounters it.

She looked at me and laughed pointlessly. Then she flounced over to the dog, kissed it with ecstasy, and swept into the kitchen, implying that a dozen chefs awaited her orders there.

Congratulations. That was the stupidest thing I've ever seen. Ever.

Some people have a gift for stupidity, an almost mystic ability to withstand any form of logic.

Commonplace minds usually condemn what is beyond the reach of their understanding.

They used to have a fish on the menu that was smoked, grilled and peppered They did everything to this fish but pistol-whip it and dress it in Bermuda shorts.

Since there are so many idiots out there, you may actually start to think you're crazy. You are not. They are idiots.

There's only one kind of common sense but a thousand varieties of stupidity.

Stupidity is the basic building block of the universe.