Demetri Martin Quotes

Having a beard is natural. When you think about it, shaving it off is quite weird.

I have a beard. Just not on my face.

How can a young man like to wear a beard?

Safety razors make it hard to grow beards in America: America would be a better place if there were a few bearded, savage, terrible old men.

I like having a beard. My beard changes my face shape and allows me to see in it family members who I love and can't see otherwise.

Over his own dark Cealdish beard. "Nothing like your marvelous facebear.

I'm obsessed with beards. First of all, beards make you look like more of an animal. Second, I kind of like biting beards; it's a pastime of mine. And when I make out with a dude who has a beard - who are the only kinds of dudes I make out with - then my glitter gets stuck in their beards, and then no other chick will make out with them for at least three days.

A full beard looks cool.

Phil has the classic, mature beard. Jase's is kind of red - it's weird, like him! Jep grooms his the most: He's got all these special lotions and perfumes that he puts on.

I got into beards right in the middle of the hipster boom.

It's a weird thing, beards now. I'll be in east London, and lads come up to me: 'Yo man, what beard oil do you use?' I'm like, 'I don't know what you're talking about.' It's just laziness.

Come on, man, I got a full beard!

Dad at breakfast today being very quiet. I notice he is clean shaven. I said to him, "Vati, what has happened to the little beaver that used to live on the end of your chin?

The beard must not be plucked. Ye shall not deface the figure of your beard.

I just grow a terrible mustache, so I try to use my neckbeard as a substitute. And when I get lazy, I don't shave that often.

I don't think I'll ever be able to grow a beard.

A decent beard has long been the number one must-have fashion item for any fugitive from justice.

Sometimes in the heart of the summer, I look at people with their faces shaved and think it'd be nice, but once you get used to it, it's not as hot. Most guys say it gets itchy, but once you grow it out into a big man beard, the itching is gone.

First of all, I wish I could grow a beard.

For anybody that grow a beard or have hair on their face, I welcome you to the beard game. We're all family. I encourage that. I encourage beards.

I find the ritual of shaving very relaxing, but for every day, it's pretty irritating on my skin, so I like having the definition a beard gives.

I can't grow a beard.

I have the softest beard in the world. As far as growing it, it doesn't itch, and it's so non-intrusive. But I am so sick of hair on my face and on my head.

Growing a beard is tough and not as easy as one might think.

The beard has gotta stay. That's my staple. I can't get rid of it.