Jim Samuels Quotes

I often say that if you want to really want to understand the contract of marriage, just ask anyone who has been divorced. The marriage contract is one of property rights. Or maybe you can look in the Bible to see what Adam had to say about divorce, since Eve was his second wife.

I can't go too much into my domestic life because there are ex-wives ready to do me in.

They got married, they got divorced, and half their money goes out the window.

I have worked and earned all my life and have found that divorce is an expensive process. Whichever way you look at it, you are going to halve your wealth. If you can avoid it, do. It is an awful process.

I decided to write about the myths of divorce.

Unfenced by law, the unmarried lover can quit a bad relationship at any time. But you - the legally married person who wants to escape doomed love - may soon discover that a significant portion of your marriage contract belongs to the State, and that it sometimes takes a very long while for the State to grant you your leave.

The details surrounding both my marriage and subsequent filing for divorce are private, and I had hoped to keep them that way for the sake of my family.

You never really know a man until you have divorced him.

Divorce is expensive. I used to joke they were going to call it 'all the money,' but they changed it to 'alimony.' It's ripping your heart out through your wallet.

Married in 1983, separated in 1987, and divorced in 1988. Enough said.

A marriage ends up being a business deal: no matter how long or short it is, somebody owes somebody money.

It was just a very short period of time that I had a brief marriage.

A wife lasts only for the length of the marriage, but an ex-wife is there for the rest of your life.

Ah, yes, divorce... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.

When I talk about divorce, I am not blaming the women I've married. It's not their fault.

Alimony - the ransom that the happy pay to the devil.

Lawyers know how to take isolated complaints in a divorce case and build them into one big one.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

It's always best to stay out of other people's divorces. And their civil wars.

All of my marriages lasted seven years.

I never thought I would be divorced.

Let me be serious: divorce is a sacred institution between a man and a woman who hate each other. God wanted Adam to pay alimony to Eve, not Steve.

You never realize how short a month is until you pay alimony.

The only thing I like more than my wife is my money, and I'm not about to lose that to her and her lawyers, that's for damn sure.

I was made to believe there was a plan in place for ending Donald's previous marriage. I pulled away because I wanted to allow him the time to deal with his wife.