Phyllis Diller Quotes

I don't want marriage. You know why? Because I did that. I did it for 32 years.

The only good husbands stay bachelors: They're too considerate to get married.

Why get married and make one man miserable when I can stay single and make thousands miserable?

I don't want to marry again. I did that.

I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house.

I'm a romantic; you have to be to marry four times.

Marriage is a very good thing, but I think it's a mistake to make a habit out of it.

I'll never get married again, and I always hate to say never to anything, but I will never marry again.

I love being married. I've been married three times.

I've had five weddings but if I'm really honest and if I count significant de factos... I've had nine husbands... which sounds appalling but when you consider I started at 18 and I'm 65 it's not so bad.

If you need to be bound to someone, then it's important to be married. If you are independent, then it's important to not be married.

I'm not saying I am never going to fall in love again, but there is no need to marry.

Stay single as long as you can - you'll be married the rest of your life.

The last thing in the world I want to do is marry. I am too selfish, but I won't elaborate on that.

Men are my hobby, if I ever got married I'd have to give it up.

I can't be a wife. I'm not that sort of person. Wives have to compromise all the time.

I've come to the conclusion that I'm not supposed to be married.

If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married.

I'm done with men... I'm going to be alone. I have no luck with relationships. I don't think I'm made for marriage.

I got a few marriage proposals in my 20s. I just wasn't ready. I just knew if I committed, I would've wound up doing something wrong, messing it up. I still felt like I had some living to do.

I've always been wary of marriage.

I like getting married, but I don't like being married.

I'll tell you one thing, since I'm married, single people look absolutely ridiculous to me.

Marriage is a mistake every man should make.

I'm a heathen when it comes to marriage.