Intestinal Health Quotes

I could eat a feeling faster than anybody, put a little hot sauce on it and wouldn't recognize it until it showed up on my behind three days later.

Nobody makes a turd like that and lives.

"Yeah, well, if you eat red meat, it stays in your colon for fifteen years!" Good! I paid for it; I want it in my ass, okay? I want them to find a meat sweater from my esophagus to my asshole when they open me up in the end! "This guy's covered in meat! He's Meat-Man! He's Meat-Tracheotomy-Man!"

God gave us intestines for a reason. I'm not keen on surgery. It's too extreme. All it took was one of those plastic surgery shows to see how violent it is.

As fiber and other nondigestible carbs pass through your intestine, they bring other nutrients - often fat - along for the ride. This prevents your intestine from breaking down and absorbing some of the fat and cholesterol from the food you eat.

My asshole is doing as much to keep me alive as my brain.

you aren't what you eat - you are what you don't poop.

A good reliable set of bowels is worth more to a man than any quantity of brains.

I respect so much the work that so many women do, but that's just not what I do. I have a job where I advertise yogurt that makes you poop, and people love it and tell me about their bowel movements, every day.

Nutrition science, however, suggests that golden rice alone will not greatly diminish vitamin A defi-ciency and associated blindness. [”¦] People whose diets lack [fats and proteins] or who have intestinal diarrheal diseases -- common in develop-ing countries -- cannot obtain vitamin A from golden rice.

Remember that physical beauty is evolution's way of assuring us that the other person doesn't have too many intestinal parasites.

You do live longer with bran, but you spend the last fifteen years on the toilet.

The longer I have been at this the more I think that lectins are the cause of leaky gut and all diseases.

There is no such thing as a cleanse. Cleanses tell you that you need to get rid of that piece of gum you swallowed in fifth grade that is still stuck to your intestinal lining. That's not true.

Thought depends absolutely on the stomach, but in spite of that, those who have the best stomachs are not the best thinkers.

All these bacteria that coat our skin and live in our intestines, they fend off bad bacteria. They protect us. And you can't even digest your food without the bacteria that are in your gut. They have enzymes and proteins that allow you to metabolize foods you eat.

If you stretched the average person's intestines out from end to end, it would make them scream a lot.

I try to eat food that hasn't been washed in ammonia and then packaged in the shape of breaded dinosaurs filled with cheese - even though those are very tasty. I like to eat food that can actually make it through the 20-plus feet of my small intestine.

All prejudices may be traced back to the intestines. A sedentary life is the real sin against the Holy Ghost.

The body cannot produce enzymes in perfect combinations to metabolize your foods as completely as the food enzymes created by nature do. This results in partially digested fats, proteins, and starches that can clog your body's intestinal tract and arteries.

I like colonic irrigation because sometimes you find old jewelry.

Everybody has a colon. Everyone over 50 needs to get their colon checked.