golf terminology Quotes

It was a morning when all nature shouted Fore! The breeze, as it blew gently up from the valley, seemed to bring a message of hope and cheer, whispering of chip shots holed and brassies landing squarely on the meat. The fairway, as yet unscarred by the irons of a hundred dubs, smiled greenly up at the azure sky.

So I went way too in depth? I thought they wanted the hole by hole.

I've been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals.

Oakmont, you've got to be playing slope.

Fairway: a narrow strip of mown grass that separates two groups of golfers looking for lost balls in the rough.

Everyone wants to be known as a great striker of the ball for some reason. Nobody wants to be called a lucky, one-putting s.o.b.

Where I play, the greens always break toward the bar.

Hole in One: an occurence in which a ball is hit directly from the tee into the hole in a single shot by a golfer playing alone.

I can't putt. The reasons are infinite. When lining up a putt, I can't remember if the ball always breaks to the ocean or to the valley or away from Pinnacle Peak. And because I took up the game in Minnesota, in what is often called Middle America, I also grew up asking, 'To which ocean does it break?'

G is for Green, that's constructed to roll in every direction away from the hole.

I've always tried to play golf with a golf club. I have a hard time driving with my rifle. I mean, 18 is really narrow ... I have no problem with the course, except for the tee shot on 18.

Duffers who consistently shank their balls are urged to buy and study Shanks - No Thanks by R.K. Hoffman, or in extreme cases, M.S. Howard's excellent Tennis for Beginners.

A tap-in is a putt that is short enough to be missed one-handed.

Caddies are a breed of their own. If you shoot 66, they say, "Man, we shot 66!" But go out and shoot 77, and they say "Hell, he shot 77!"

I play a lot of charity golf mainly. I'm a bandit 18 if I play two or three times a week.

One thing both men have in common is a love of golf and a shared knowledge of the word "mulligan," which means a do-over to replace a lousy shot.

After all these years, it's still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye.

If all else fails, birdie the last.

I assume my stance, and take back the club, low, slowly; at the top, my eyes fog over, and my joints dip and swirl like barn swallows, I swing. There is a fruitless commotion of dust and rubber at my feet. "Smothered it," I say promptly. After enough lessons the terminology becomes second nature.

He knows all the golf lingo. You know? You hit your ball, he's like "there's a golf shot. That's a golf shot." Well of course it's a golf shot; I just hit a golf ball. You don't see Gretzky skating around going "there's a hockey shot, that's a hockey shot."

In golf, 'close' is like the north and south rim of the Grand Canyon.

I read the greens in Spanish, but putt in English.

For me, 'choking' is just another term in golf.

They call it golf because all the other four-letter words were taken.