Orson Scott Card Quotes

Humour is a great vehicle for getting a message across. If you get too serious, you could die of starch.

My main point is to be funny; if I can slip a message in there, fine.

There's always a message in my comedy.

If you use tact you can say anything, then make it funny.

Humor is the affectionate communication of insight.

Comedy is the most palliative way to make a point. People are more willing to listen if they can laugh.

Humor's an excellent way to make a point more palatable and/or relatable.

If you're going to tell people the truth, be funny or they'll kill you.

Things have to be funny first, and if they want to have a point, that's awesome.

Comedy can take you a lot further in getting your point across. People are entertained, and then, by being entertained, they get your point.

I wanna be funny, but if I have a chance to make a point while being funny - why not?

Joan Rivers, who said to Marcel Marceau, Can we talk? Never got a dinner!

I think comedy is a really, really good tool for trying to say something.

It is not fair to treat as serious that which is only said in joke.

My wife went into the butchers and said: "You've a sheep's head in your window." The butcher said: "That's a mirror."

Ted Lewis could make the clarinet talk. What it said was put me back in the case!

President Bush released his tax returns yesterday. He listed the economy as a liability. He gets to write that off.

Jeff Foxworthy is a legend. Every time I see his moustache it reminds me to wax my lip and every time I hear his jokes it reminds me to wipe my ass.

Benedict Cumberbatch is not only the best name in show business, it's also the response you get when you ask John Travolta to pronounce Ben Affleck.

When Ling was communicating to any person the signs by which messengers might find him, he was compelled to add, "the neighbourhood in which this contemptible person resides is that officially known as 'the mean quarter favoured by the lower class of those who murder by treachery'," and for this reason he was not always treated with the regard to which his attainments entitled him, or which he would have unquestionably received had he been able to describe himself as of "the partly-drained and uninfected area reserved to Mandarins and their friends.

The last ever dolphin message was misinterpreted as a surprisingly sophisticated attempt to do a double-backwards-somersault through a hoop whilst whistling the 'Star Spangled Banner', but in fact the message was this: So long and thanks for all the fish.

God created astrologers to make pollsters look accurate.

Even the idiot may have a message for us

I gravitate towards anything that has a grain of comedy to it.

Well," he said, "f’r example, if they ask where you’ve come from, you could say ‘Behind me,’and if they asked where you’re going, you’d say ‘In front of me.