Scott Aukerman Quotes

I want to be the Letterman of metal. I want five nights a week, Monday to Friday, 11 to 12, live. I always shoot for the moon.

If we're talking fantasy, I would love to host a late night talk show... More Fallon than Leno. Those guys always seem like they're having way too much fun at their 'jobs.'

Don't ever rope me in as a late-night talk show host. I don't want to be one.

Sometimes I look back and think, 'Good. I'd love to go in and bang out a good episode of 'Talk Soup' today.'

I love being a regular on 'Chelsea Lately!'

I hope to do the 'Letterman' show, 'Leno,' all that.

After 'Jamai Raja,' I wanted to experiment, hence tried my hands at 'Comedy Nights Bachao Taaza.'

I did a 'Golden Girls' once, which shot in front of an audience, and that went well. I had a good time. But I need an audience, for comedy at least.

'Saturday Night Live' is live television. Nothing can compare to that.

'The David Letterman Show' is a show of comedy.

On Letterman and Leno, it always bothers me when they go outside the studio and it's daytime.

I am always so happy to be at 'SNL.' I still feel like a kid when I'm there, like I can't believe I'm watching them make the show.

In point of fact, I'm not sure there are too many comedies with laugh tracks anymore. Most of what you hear is live studio audience laughing as a show is filmed. If this prompts you to wonder who those actual human beings are who are laughing at some of this stuff, that is a mystification I share.

But I really like hosting, I think it's a strength of mine. It allows me to improvise, and I love the spontaneity of that, and I think I'm funny behind the desk when interviewing someone.

Simply being a guest on David Letterman's show has been a highlight of my career. I never dreamed that I would follow in his footsteps, though everyone in late night follows Dave's lead. I'm thrilled and grateful that CBS chose me. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go grind a gap in my front teeth.

I was a big Jay Leno fan, so I was sorry to see him go. But my number one person that I watch, she's not late night, but in terms of the comedian genre, is Ellen DeGeneres - love her.

I'd love to host a reality show now and not be a contestant in it. I want to take a show forward.

I've been obsessed with David Letterman forever, and I'd love to be the drag version of David Letterman.

My big dream is to be a late-night host, but it's like, what does that even mean?

I like anything with a live audience. I love sitcom work. I hope it comes back in fashion because I really love it. I love single-camera work, too, but in a different way than that live-audience thing, which is really exciting.

I don't know why ESPN asked me to host the ESPYs. I think that they realize we, over at WWE, can engage a live audience. We certainly have an enormous following.

When the opportunity came along to do 'Win, Lose or Draw,' I took it selfishly to find out if I did enjoy being me on camera. And I did that for the last two years I was doing 'Mama's Family.'

I started 'The Daily Show' when I was 22. I was going to class at Long Beach.

My first job was being a page at 'The Tonight Show.' I saw Jack Paar come out one night and sit on the edge of his desk and talk about what he'd done the night before. I thought, 'I can do that!' I used to do that on a street corner in the Bronx with all my buddies.

'Weekend Update' can be presented as a full 20-minute sketch, and there's a lot of room there.