David Duchovny Quotes

I think it's kinda nice.' And I did. my mom isn't famous for her pies. No, she's famous for defusing a nuclear device in Brussels with only a pair of cuticle scissors and a ponytail holder. Somehow, at the moment, pies seemed cooler.

I think my favorite thing is when people send me Instagram photos of people's yearbooks, and one guy will put "Are you calling me a liar?," and his friend will have "I ain't calling you a truther." And those are people's actual yearbook quotes. That's so amazing.

I'm always going to do whatever I think is funniest. If something's dark, I'll do it. If it's a sock puppet, if it's a stool, I'll do it.

Have you ever noticed that things that don’t kill you make you weaker? And great minds don’t think alike. If they did, the patent office would only have about fifty inventions. I started getting suspicious when I cried over spilt milk and the cashier took it off my bill.” - Wally

The legend goes that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland. I was thinking... that must be hard to put all the tiny seatbelts on all the snakes.

I think my favorite theory so far is that I am actually a robot. That's pretty great. In real life.

I've got a black woolen hat and it's got Pervert written across the front of it. It's the name of the clothing label. And I was with my wife and my baby at the supermarket and I didn't think. I just put my hat on Clara's head, because it was cold. And the looks. I couldn't figure out why I was getting death looks. And then I realized my 10-month old baby's wearing a hat with the word Pervert written on it and these people were like, 'There's Satan! There's Satan out with his kid!' And then I made a point of her wearing it every time we went there.

My take on celebrity is simply that some of us have to make a bigger fool of ourselves than others.

Bill Clinton may in fact be moving back into the White House. And coincidentally I'm thinking about moving back into my mother's house.

[Comedy] is an escape from illusions. The audience is...thinking, 'This bullshit we see and hear all day makes no sense.'

I've got this brilliant thing where I go, 'I'm Robbie Williams', and people are interested in what I want to say - which is amazing because I'm just an idiot from Stoke-on-Trent.

The last living boy in America drops into my bedroom only he wants to be a monk. I think that pretty much sums up my life.

I think comedy's often the little and the large, isn't it?

Politicians can do more funny things naturally than I can think of to do purposely

I think life is a jape. Yours, mine, everyone's

God probably thinks it’s worth giving a sense of humor only to those of us who have to laugh at all the rubbish bits that are wrong with us.

That's part of the comedy, too, is we do have jokes throughout of hanging a lantern on the absurdity of the world. Like, when BoJack's flying over the neighborhood, you see some houses have swimming pools in the backyard, and what does that mean? Why would there be a swimming pool underwater? But we thought it was funny.

I have had some sorry-ass looks, but I'm the first one to laugh. I'm either to credit or to blame for the '80s.

I naturally think in terms of comedy whenever I see anything because tragedy is so close to comedy, so I like to add the tragedy to the comedy or a little bit of comedy to the tragedy in order to make them both feel more real to me.

Way, way back in the day, like in the 1990s, if you wanted to tell everyone you ate waffles for breakfast, you couldn’t just go on the Internet and tweet it out. There was only one way to do it. You had to go outside and scream at the top of your lungs, 'I ate waffles for breakfast!' That’s why so many people ended up in institutions. They seemed crazy, but when you think about it, they were just ahead of their time.

I think Georges Feydeau said comedy is just tragedy speeded up.

I’m not certain you’d know the right sort of man for you if he arrived on our doorstep riding an elephant.” “I would think the elephant would be a fairly good indication that I ought to look elsewhere.

I'm so happy, I think I'll dress up like J. Edgar Hoover and sing show tunes.

I want to thank everyone for believing in me, even though I only have 27,000 Instagram followers.

The thing about Donald [Trump] is the jokes write themselves. I don't even think of it to be trolling. What he says is the joke.