Arthur C. Clarke Quotes

You don't know anything, but I know even less.

Although it is generally known, I think it's about time to announce that I was born at a very early age.

Irony has seeped into the felt of any fedora hat I have ever owned - not out of any wish of mine, but out of necessity. A fedora hat worn by me without the necessary protective irony would eat through my head and kill me.

If my critics saw me walking over the Thames they would say it was because I couldn't swim.

Smatterers in learning are the most opinionated.

I must confess, I was born at a very early age.

Everything I say is a joke. I am a joke myself.

I wasn't born a fool. It took work to get this way.

Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth.

I think I've been called edgy - but in all honesty, there is a safety in what I do because I'm always the idiot. Unless you're just listening to buzz words and not taking into account the context of the situation, you see I'm always the ignoramus.

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

People say, 'Since you got rich and famous, you've become insufferable.' I say, 'That's not true. I've always been insufferable.'

I think what's hysterically funny is a guy who sets himself up as the most confident, everything's-perfect, know-it-all, things-are-swell human being and then gets wiped out every time.

It is by no means necessary to understand things to speak confidently about them.

I love playing people who don't have a sense of humor for instance, there's nothing funnier to me than a person with no sense of humor.

I don't get along with anything, I really don't...I'm, I'm, maybe I'm just a, you know, incredibly tasteful human being.

I just remembered that I'm absent minded... wait, I mean I lost my mind, I can't find it.

The funniest thing about some people is that they have no sense of humor.

In other words, the more stupid one is, the more he thinks he knows.

We've got a lot of experience of not having any experience

Many men would have arrived at wisdom had they not believed themselves to have arrived there already.

Jokes? There are no jokes. The truth is the funniest joke of all.

If I had a sense of humor, I'd be laughing right now.

I am a man of my word… and that word is “unreliable.

I dreamed I was buying new shoes last night," said Ron. "What d'ya think that's gonna mean?" "Probably that you're going to be eaten by a giant marshmallow or something," said Harry.