Doug Stanhope Quotes

The children of childish parents age quickly.

If you're offended, it's your problem.

I was raised mostly by my mom.

If you're offended by any word in any language, it's probably because your parents were unfit to raise a child.

Though we marry as adults, we don't marry adults. We marry children who have grown up and still rejoice in being children, especially if we're creative.

Another part of what gave me a questioning, rabble-rousing, activist heart and soul is that when all these heavy events went down, my parents did not shelter the kids from it.

It never occurs to you when you are very young to need something other than what your parents have to offer you.

I was brought up by two extremely intelligent people who gave me the greatest gift that man can give anyone, and that is freedom from fear.

Never underestimate the power of self-absorption, including your parents' self-absorption.

Badgered, snubbed and scolded on the one hand; petted, flattered and indulged on the other-it is astonishing how many children work their way up to an honest manhood in spite of parents and friends. Human nature has an element of great toughness in it.

Your parents were always trying to get you to be careful when you were a kid, and that's all pervasive in this society.

For me, as much about being a parent as it is about being a child.

There's a part in every person that has a fake self. We've had this since infancy due to our parents and our upbringing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

One thing that prevents a man from being a good father is he hasn't completed being a boy.

Parents who indulge themselves 'in moderation' may have children who indulge themselves to excess.

I think what matures us is time, not necessarily our physical bodies. So I think she can probably change as much as human would in the timespan of the show. However, I do think as a human you reach a point where there's a certain amount of humility and acceptance of life and its consequences when you see your own body change and age, and the pounds come or the wrinkles come.

The problem with taking offense is that it's really hard to figure out what to do with it after you're done using it. Better to just leave it on the table and walk away. Umbrage untaken quietly disappears.

when we are young our parents run our life; when we get older, our children do.

I'm trying to teach my children not to cry. That's the big thing. No crying. Because I think we can all agree that crying is, for the most part, for sissies. If my team loses, I'm going to cry. And I'm going to want my kids to see me crying. Not because I think sports are so important, but because I bet so much money on the game that we'll probably lose the house if my team doesn't win. That's something to cry about.

I deal in emotions. It's the harmonic side that's important. That's the side I expected to be much further along on than I am now. That just means to say that I've got to keep at it.

How can those of us who are parents help our children recognize their bliss?

I think all of us are always five years old in the presence and absence of our parents.

I never thought I'd be a role model this early. It caught me off-guard, but it says a lot about how I was brought up, what my values have been, and how my parents raised me. It's very flattering that being myself is enough to be a role model.

What you leave in your children, is more important than what you leave to them