Anthony Jeselnik Quotes

I'm going to do my job and I don't care if I'm not friends with anybody. I don't need to be best friends with all my co-workers to do a good job.

If you don't like your job, you don't strike! You just go in every day, and do it really half assed. That's the American way.

I believe I do my job the way I have to do it.

I'd rather work with someone who's good at their job but doesn't like me, than someone who likes me but is a ninny.

Most people sort of enjoy going to work because of the socialisation, a chance to flirt with co-workers and so on, but actually hate the job they do.

Sometimes I wish I could get fired.

Never quit a job as a matter of principle. You'll always regret it.

Some people go to their job. That's the job they have; they have to do it. They hate their boss and their coworkers, this and that. It's hard to get along.

I always ask candidates two things: 'How many times have you been fired?' and, 'Do you watch your clock when it's time to go? Do you look at your phone? Do you look at your watch?'

You don't have to be serious all the time to do a good job.

Listen: when you work for an employer for six years, are you gonna sit here and tell me you ain't gotta bad thing to say about them?

I'm always playing jokes, even on the manager - some, not many. I want to try and keep my place in the squad.

My first real job lasted for three years. It ended the day I was unceremoniously fired.

When you lack interest in the case the job will very likely lack skill and diligence in the performance.

Keeping your head down and doing the best job you can in the beginning gives you the opportunity to be evaluated on the basis of the contributions you are making. [Then], when you feel strongly about your work or about a position, you'll be given more attention [than] if you hadn't done that constantly.

Whatever the job you are asked to do at whatever level, do a good job because your reputation is your resume.

I do my job like I breathe — so if I can’t breathe I’m in trouble.

Play every game as if your job depended on it. It just might.

I'm doing my job. I'm doing what's expected out of me, and I'm proud of the way I've been able to perform and contribute.

Nobody goes to work to do a bad job.

Intelligence is the effort to do the best you can at your particular job; the quality that gives dignity to that job, whether it happens to be scrubbing a floor or running a corporation.

We’re all pros already. 1) We show up every day 2) We show up no matter what 3) We stay on the job all day 4) We are committed over the long haul 5) The stakes for us are high and real 6) We accept remuneration for our labor 7) We do not overidentify with our jobs 8 ) We master the technique of our jobs 9) We have a sense of humor about our jobs 10) We receive praise or blame in the real world

I don't know any other job that the off-the-field issues - especially something personal like that - affects your job. But as far as the parenting lesson, no [I understood that]. To me it was so simple, it was a situation where I disciplined my child and it didn't turn out the way I wanted.

In a professional once engaged, the performance of the job comes first.

This is a job and we want to have fun. But it's a job and we should look like we're going to work.