Garry Marshall Quotes

I learned early in life that laughter is a great way to diffuse and uncomfortable situation, so I began to use that as a tool, throughout my life.

I used comedy to deflect a lot of situations; if you make someone laugh, they don't want to punch you in the face.

My dad always told me to stand up to bullies, and Bill O'Reilly is kind of a bully, and he's the kind of kid who hits other kids on the playground. And when you hit him, he runs to the teacher and says, 'Teacher, sue him.'

Now, where does my comedy come from, like, as a human being? Yeah, when I was a kid I was dyslexic and had to go to special-ed every day and felt stupid about that and got very witty to defend myself.

My tongue is what I used instead of my fists because I was a small and cowardly young man. Amusing people with stories and being bizarre with words was my way of getting out of fixes.

When I was growing up, I was obviously gay, and I got heckled every day of my life. The only way I knew how to survive was to make people laugh. If I could make them laugh, I wouldn't get hung in a locker for two hours. That's a blessing.

Barking dogs occasionally bite, but laughing men hardly ever shoot.

I was the fat kid, so as a defense mechanism, I was the jokester.

My dad actually taught me to box when I was, like, nine years old, because I got picked on at school all of the time. I was on a boys' hockey team, so I would get all of my aggression out there.

I would make people who bullied me laugh, so that's my defense mechanism.

People's behavior is not always changed based on a loss. I remember my dad or my uncle used to say, 'If that guy's picking on you, punch him once in the face, and he'll never come back again.' I don't know how true that is.

I always try to find something funny in any situation.

I didn't get into too many fights when I was younger. I think I got into, like, one fight when I was in high school, and that was because someone was being rude towards my mom, and that was it.

I crack jokes all the time. Even when I have a fight, I will make a joke, and people will laugh.

I had people come up from NXT and say to me, 'one thing we know is that we hear you're a bully,' I say that I am because I know that I am going to be bullied back at some point so I might as well start it.

You didn't have to take a punch for me, you know,' he said. 'I'm a lover, not a fighter.' 'You're a freak is what you are,' I said.

What was your secret?" That brought another smile. "Learn to laugh, otherwise, you'll beat them to death with a hammer first chance

I think a sense of humor is the most important thing anyone can have.

I was fortunate enough to never really be bullied. Maybe one time in middle school, but it was my fault. I had said something to someone, and they waited for me outside for a month until finally I put my dukes up and ran out. It was completely my fault.

Weak people always attack strong people - it's safer. It's weak people who are dangerous, who lash out uncontrollably and hurt you back. Stong people can walk away - no repercussions, you see, if you attack a stong person.

You know with a bully you cannot let them slap you around, because they slap you around today, they slap you five or six times tomorrow. We are not going to be bullied.

I think I became funny because I grew up in the Bronx. I was small and weak and Jewish instead of large and fierce and Puerto Rican. You need something.

Laughter is the only thing that'll cut trouble down to a size where you can talk to it.

You know what really shuts up a bully? Learning how to build a pipe-bomb!

I wasn't a predator. I didn't pick on other people all right, but people didn't beat me up.