Mitch Hedberg Quotes

I got into gambling when I was playing a casino. I was a hermit in those days. I would go onstage, go to my room, or if we had to travel, I'd get in a car or a plane, whatever. But I didn't do anything. One day, this friend of mine said, 'Do you want to play some blackjack?'

I've been gambling since the age of 12. Horses, dogs, dice, roulette, you name it.

I've always played cards. I can't remember when there wasn't a gambling game going on somewhere, even if it was a craps game in a wheelbarrow on the backside of the racetrack.

I like blackjack. I like the psychology of poker.

My father was a gambler. My father could not resist a casino or a card game. He loved gambling.

I never really gambled - certainly not playing poker. I'd casually bet on a football game or joined a pool.

Yeah, I like to gamble.

I'm not a gambler, let's just say that, nor have I ever been a dealer at a casino.

I'm a gambler at heart. That's my life.

I lost $35,000 in less than a week at the Mirage in Las Vegas.

If I gamble, I go for the lowest-end blackjack or slots. It's because I don't like to lose!

I've been in Vegas. That's where you get into the money thing. Boy, you get greedy in Vegas, you know. That's the only place that you can bet $25, get it up to $500 and refuse to quit.

At night when I can't sleep, I play blackjack online until I get tired or I lose my money.

I don't go to casinos to gamble.

I went broke after sophomore year, gambled away all my money, sold some guns, turned $750 into $10,000, flew to Vegas, turned ten thou into $187,000.

I live in Las Vegas and I like my money, but I don't gamble, but I said to my wife I want to put a $100,000 on Shogun.

I've never bet in a casino; it's just not something I do.

But gamblers know how a man can sit for almost twenty-four hours at cards, without looking to right, or to left.

Ennui has made more gamblers than avarice.

The first thing I know, I'm in a card game. Then I'm in a crap game.

Even as I approach the gambling hall, as soon as I hear, two rooms away, the jingle of money poured out on the table, I almost go into convulsions.

There is no such thing as 'social gambling.' Either you are there to cut the other bloke's heart out and eat it -- or you're a sucker. If you don't like this choice -- don't gamble.

I love to gamble!

Most gamblers do it for ego. It's not about winning or losing, it's about challenging your ego and showing your mates you're fearless and will bet on anything.

The only thing I'm obsessed with is sleeping. I'm really good at it and if I don't do it I'm horrible.