Karl Pilkington Quotes

I ate ants. They weren't that bad.

I tell ya when I was a kid, all I knew was rejection. My yo-yo, it never came back.

One day, when I was about eight years old, some kids pushed me on stage at school during a talent show because they knew I could sing.

Before The Simpsons, I was 4 years old, so I don't know exactly what I was thinking before that.

I started making videos when I was, like, seven or eight.

When I was three years old, a nanny took me shopping and I saw large cut-outs of Mary Poppins in the store and yelled, 'That's mummy!' These women walked by and said, 'Oh how cute. That little girl thinks that Mary Poppins is her mum.'

When people ask me what qualifies me to be a writer for children, I say I was once a child. But I was not only a child, I was, better still, a weird little kid, and though I would never choose to give my own children this particular preparation for life, there are few things, apparently, more helpful to a writer than having once been a weird little kid.

I remember one play [when I was kid] was about this murderous mad scientist, and my whole part was to be the guy who got thrown into a vat of acid as the curtain went up. I was very pissed off at these older kids; they'd outsmarted me.

Dad, one of my first memories is of sharing my worry with you about the space shuttle poking holes in the atmosphere and letting out all of Earth's air.

When I was a kid my family was really poor and I remember one Halloween I wanted to dress up really scary and my parents came home with a duck costume. I wore that costume for years! I hated it.

When I was a kid I used to scoot under the table, and whenever company would come around you know or my sisters or parents would tell me, go under the table and I'd do it because it was entertainment for the family or aunts or whatever. And one time at the Paramount when I first did it, you know, Brooklyn Paramount, I did it in the act during an instrumental and it got a big ovation and so I coined it as one of the things I should do in the act. And since I've been doing it.

When I was a little kid I wanted to be Face. I thought, cos I had blond hair and he did too, that when I grew up I'd look like him.

When I was a kid, I lived in this small town way out in the country. We had three TV channels and one radio station. I couldn't even get my hands on good comic books. My aunt, who is a librarian, gave me Tolkien's "The Lord of the Rings," Laura Ingalls Wilder's "Little House on the Prairie," and Lewis's "The Chronicles of Narnia." They were such incredible treasures to have in my somewhat mundane country life.

No matter what does, or doesn't, happen for me in the music industry, getting to play the Opry as a kid was always be a highlight of mine.

I don't think anyone ever remembers what they were really like as kids. Adults think they do, but they don't. Photos and videos don't capture the real you, or bring back to life the person you used to be. You have to return to the past to do that.

The '80s were a really different time for kids.Technology has changed so much of how we stay in touch and keep tabs on people.

For whatever reason I just remembered being six years old and my parents leaving the house and trusting me to be alone. I had an older sister, I think she was supposed to babysit me but she immediately ran across the street to her friend's house.

Being with a kid always takes you to being a kid somehow, and they really are showing me a childhood I might not have had in some way.

When I was a little kid, I was the first kid in my neighborhood to have a pet alligator.

As a kid, I can't remember having anything to play with except a loose tooth. And that wasn't mine. It was my brother's.

When I was ten, my family moved to Downer's Grove, Illinois. When I was twelve, I found them.

Ive never been that cute kid that was forgiven for being naughty.

I grew up in the church and began to recite set pieces at the age of four and five, like many of the other kids.

Since I was eight years old, I went to Trinity. I mean, I listened to Reverend Wright since I was a kid and I always heard him preach sermons of love and inspiration.

My first words were 'Seconds, please.' Most kids in kindergarten napped on a little rug. I had a braided 9 x 12.