Elvis Costello Quotes

All censure of a man's self is oblique praise.

It's not good for comedy to be like, 'Thanks for liking me.' Being popular is poison.

I measure myself Against a tall tree I find that I am much taller, For I reach right up to the sun With my eye; And I reach to the shore of the sea With my ear. Nevertheless, I dislike The way the ants crawl In and out of my shadow.

I have never tried to compare myself to anyone else.

I don't mind being compared to Whitney, there are people miles worse to be compared to.

I've got no ego; I just like to have thousands of people write to me and tell me how wonderful I am.

I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.

I have never said anything critical about Ozzy that he didn't say about himself many times.

I am funny. No one else thinks I am funny. But I am funny.

People go 'You look a lot like Minnie Driver.' Once I said, 'Thanks, Minnie is a great actress.' But, it blew up in my face. This person said, 'Nah, didn't like the last movie she did.'

I'm severely overrated. I'm just above a hack. That should be the name of my new DVD: 'Chris Rock: Slightly Above Hack'.

Forgive me my nonsense, as I also forgive the nonsense of those that think they talk sense.

I'm willing to admit that I may not always be right, but I am never wrong.

A sarcastic person has a superiority complex that can be cured only by the honesty of humility.

I understand being less sexy than Osama bin Laden, but not less sexy than Carrot Top. That, I find offensive.

People are going to make comparisons and they can do that but I'm definitely not going to compare myself to Derek Jeter.

I do just genuinely believe Chris Hemsworth is a 6'3, more muscular version of me. And more handsome, but I try.

Intolerance is a form of egotism, and to condemn egotism intolerantly is to share it.

If you go on the Internet and type in 'Lee Ryan one liners,' I think I'm on par with Gandhi.

I think Maura'is funnier than I am, wittier than I am, more intelligent than I am, and I think she's just floating me at this point.

I'm industrious. Ambitious. I'm like the gay Mitt Romney... That's a terrible thing to say.

No one is better at deprecating President Trump than President Trump - just ask him.

I can only repeat, I would never compare myself to Gerd Muller.

I don't compare myself with anybody.

I'm so much better than James Vick.