Terry Pratchett Quotes

They who drink beer will think beer.

Here's how you know that you're really drunk: when you get into a taxi cab and you think the fare is the time.

Where does one not find that bland degeneration which beer produces in the spirit!

You might be a redneck if you're a lite beer drinker, because you start drinking when it gets light.

Think beer; drink beer.

I have respect for beer.

While I can't walk on water, I can certainly wobble on whisky.

No brothers shall make, buy, sell, or use, as a beverage, any spirituous or Malt Liquors, Wine, or Cider.

If drunk were cookies, I'd be Famous Amos

Beer's intellectual. What a shame so many idiots drink it.

Alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, may produce all the effects of drunkenness.

"What's so unpleasant about being drunk?" "Ask a glass of water."

A man cannot make him laugh - but that's no marvel; he drinks no wine.

I like a good beer buzz early in the morning.

If I was drunk, I wouldn’t be here at all. And really, this is pretty good for four White Russians.” “White what?” I almost sat down but was afraid the chair might dematerialize beneath me. “It’s a drink,” he said. “You’d think I wouldn’t be into something named that—you know, considering my own personal experience with Russians. But they’re surprisingly delicious. The drinks, not real Russians.

Maybe she was drunk - the woman never could drink. One little sniff of tequila and she was off into some blonde la-la land.

Most people hate the taste of beer - to begin with. It is, however, a prejudice that many people have been able to overcome.

I think this would be a good time for a beer.

Drink, sir, is a great provoker of three things . . . nose-painting, sleep, and urine. Lechery, sir, it provokes, and unprovokes; it provokes the desire, but it takes away the performance.

This beer is good for you. This is draft beer. Stick with the beer. Let's go and beat this guy up and come back and drink some more beer.

Alcohol gives you infinite patience for stupidity.

Bacchus, n.: A convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for getting drunk.

I've never, ever tasted beer.

Whiskey's to tough, Champagne costs too much, Vodka puts my mouth in gear. I hope this refrain, Will help me explain, As a matter of fact, I like beer.