Zoe Kazan Quotes

Americans spend 3 billion hours per year filling out tax forms and keeping tax records.

I'm not the only taxpayer who has no idea what he's sending to the IRS. This year, only 28 percent of all Americans will prepare their own tax returns, according to a voice in my head that invents accurate-sounding statistics.

I've never looked at a tax return without immediately losing consciousness.

It's income tax time again, Americans: time to gather up those receipts, get out those tax forms, sharpen up that pencil, and stab yourself in the aorta

Most people don't realize the amount of tax forms the small business guy has to go through.

Taxing is an easy business. Any projector can contrive new compositions, any bungler can add to the old.

Most Americans are very focused on what their tax returns will look like while President Trump is in office, not what his look like.

Taxes are way too complicated, and people spend way too much time worrying about ways to get them lower.

It's that time of year again, April 15, taxes. I know it's depressing, but just remember, you're paying for roads, bridges, hospitals, and an army to keep the nation free. Unfortunately that nation is Afghanistan.

Today is tax day. A lot of people are hoping they get refunds. And that's just the folks here in the audience.

As far as my tax returns, you don't learn that much from tax returns.

I have paid taxes every year, a lot of taxes.

Why can't Americans do their own taxes? Because the federal Tax Code is out of control, that's why. It's gigantic and insanely complex, and it gets worse all the time. Nobody has ever read the whole thing. IRS workers are afraid to go into the same ROOM with it.

It's April 15, tax day. The federal tax code is over 74,000 pages long. But stick with it because after page 72,000, it gets really good.

Even with multiple instruction books, maneuvering the maze of the tax code is costly and time-consuming.

I used to do my own taxes. You know how you buy that gigantic sheet at Staples, add up the restaurants, clothes, and taxis and glue your receipts into the book month by month? The more money I made, the more complicated things got.

My taxes alone keep eight lawyers busy, and when I finally get my money, it's only one-third of what I earn. With the kids in school and my other responsibilities, I get no change back from the first million dollars. The money flows out like water.

Simplicity just isn't a word synonymous with taxes.

We need to simplify our tax code. We need to make sure that it’s not too cumbersome for people to be able to comply with. And that they don’t end up spending more money trying to file their taxes than they do actually paying in.

Tax Day is often a source of frustration for taxpayers, so anything that can make the process less painful is appreciated.

You grow up, no one really teaches you about taxes, especially as an athlete.

Now, people have a hard time understanding how taxes work.

I'll bring my tax returns; you bring yours. I'll meet you anytime anywhere.

I pay hundreds of millions of dollars in taxes.