Kinky Friedman Quotes

Golf is one of the few sports where a white man can dress like a black pimp and not look bad.

Baffling late-life discovery: Golfers wear those awful clothes on purpose.

Golf is a game where white men can dress up as black pimps and get away with it.

I like to look good on the golf course.

When I was a kid, dressing right and looking good was a priority. As I grew up, I just wanted to stay that way, stick out a bit and have my own thing. That's where white belts and wearing some colors started. So signing with Puma was a great fit for me. I usually travel with nine pairs of golf shoes and 10 belts.

I think I've heard somebody say that I was a well-dressed golfer. I guess that has something to do with the fact that a lot of people who play golf don't dress very well.

Actually, I love golf clothes! I think this is the most interesting part of golf!

I've always said golf can be a turn-off - all those middle-aged men in bad jumpers. I want to be a bit more of a character.

Golf is a central part of my life and I look forward to working with the great folks at Vineyard Vines to create an authentic golf apparel brand that speaks to the golfer.

Golf is the absolute worst place for me to be because I am the exact opposite of everything that a golfer should encompass, should be, and I'm not.

I'd give up golf if I didn't have so many sweaters.

Because of the suit I was wearing, I couldn't make a good pivot on the swing. And I had to hit the ball with one hand.

I can't give up Golf, I've got too many sweaters.

Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.

Who listens to golfers? They're boring. If I want to wear camouflage on the golf course during a tournament, I will. And I have.

I'm not a big shorts person. Personally, I hate to see men's legs on the golf course.

Here's a simple way to abolish golf's elitist and exclusionary image and make it a truly all-American sport: ditch that fifties-Republican-martini-drinker's green Brooks Brothers-style sport jacket and make the winner of the Masters slip on something in, say, black leather with plenty of metal studs.

Golf got complicated when I had to wear shoes and begin thinking about what I was doing.

Ours is a youth culture, and like a golf tournament, we honor only low scores.

The emblem on the necktie reserved for the members of the Royal and Ancient Golf Club of St. Andrews - The Vatican of golf - is of St. Andrew himself bearing the slatier cross on which, once he was captured at Patras, he was to be stretched before he was crucified.Only the Scots would have thought of celebrating a national game with the figure of a tortured saint.

The terrible beauty is that in the brotherhood of golf we are all the same - certifiable.

I'm not trying to write a bleak and blistering screed against American civilization. I'm writing something that I hope is fun and satirical and full of possibility.

I saw a sign on the side of the road in Tennessee once that said 'dirt for sale'... what a great country we live in. DIRT for sale. How would you like to get inside that guy's mind and look around for a hour? That guy sees opportunity at every glance, doesn't he?

I like travelers, but I don't like tourists. The difference is that travelers don't shop and they don't play golf.

Always keep in mind that if God didn't want a man to have mulligans, golf balls wouldn't come three to a sleeve.